


Stop Standing In My Way

by teiidae



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Conspiracy Theories, Game: Kingdom Hearts Chain of Memories, M/M, Mild Smut, Rare Pairings, Slow Burn, join my XigMar cult, xigmar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-29
Updated: 2018-09-25
Packaged: 2018-12-08 10:52:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 34,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11645073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teiidae/pseuds/teiidae
Summary: The Organization has an unusual issue to contend with. Marluxia defeated Sora, and Sora has disappeared, much to Xemnas's veiled dismay. The air is thick with intrigue, but it is a dangerous time to try to divide the remaining members. The only one left to deal with is Riku, but with Sora overcome, speculation leans towards Riku succumbing to a similar fate. Xigbar intends to make the first move - against Xemnas's orders. Of course the boss doesn't need to know, now does he?





	1. The Lord Kneels

**Author's Note:**

> Timeline: Universe Alteration where Sora loses the fight with Marluxia in CoM.
> 
> Possibly a series investigating the consequences of Marluxia surviving Castle Oblivion.

The final strike between the Valiant Hero and the Lord of the Castle had been colossal and it rang through the stark white halls, calling for the resignation of all who had previously antagonized the appointed leader. Even the basement levels quaked, and silence permeated the very existence of Castle Oblivion in the final hour of its life as a battleground. It was over. The battle was over and the aftermath was just beginning to rise from the ashes of murdered members and traitors in the ranks.

Marluxia, tall, powerful, and very exhausted, stared down his adversary, a brown-haired child with bright blue eyes. Neither had the energy to move, but after a long period of heavy breathing, Sora, the Keyblade wielder, fell to the floor. He was broken. Defeated. And Marluxia had a new pawn at his disposal, though it wasn't quite that easy. Things like this rarely ever were.

Marluxia was incredibly vulnerable right now, though his work wasn't finished. Axel would have fled, having killed Vexen to gain favor and then hiding once the dust settled and Marluxia was still standing.

The battle had been arduous and had sapped him of his strength almost to the breaking point. Wisps of his reality slid in and out of his view, and he was almost certain that he was going to fade into whatever waited for an empty husk like him. Sora, however, was defeated and that was only the first of many steps in Marluxia's grand scheme.

For all the hurdles Marluxia had had to jump through and all the strings he had had to pull delicately, his plan had been successful. Almost too successful. He found that when he could afford the energy to focus on the next step of his agenda, his mind went blank. What did he do now that he had Sora ready to dance in the palm of his hands? With Namine at his beck and call, returned to her prison, Sora's memories and motives could be reshaped so easily, it was a wonder that their battle had even happened in the first place. Both Sora and Namine were wrapped around his fingers, and if they were applied deliberately, there was no way Sora would be defeated a second time.

Marluxia wouldn't allow it. Suddenly, the idea of allowing Xemnas to continue his own plot was looking like less and less of an option. Xemnas was now a legitimate threat. A pitiful tyrant who had a lot more leverage for the time being.

After all, in Marluxia's eyes, Xemnas was pitiful. And now it seemed more evident than ever that the two would be at odds. Marluxia was supposed to be dead at the end of this. A lot of them were supposed to be dead at the end of this. Larxene, his partner in crime and faithful ally, fell and that put Marluxia in a bad spot. She was likely the only one who willingly worked with him. They were nigh unstoppable together, but it was apparent that Larxene hadn't been strong enough to defend herself from Sora.

The politics of Marluxia's new situation wound around his throat and tightened minutely.

He had a lot to answer for. How did he defeat the Keyblade wielder? Why was Vexen dead? Where was Sora and Larxene?

Marluxia's brain turned in on itself and erupted into a spine breaking migraine. The bright whites of the walls beamed into his eyes and blinded him. He was going to die. After all this, he was going to fade away...

But he couldn't let that happen. Not now. He sank to his knees, clinging to Graceful Dahlia like it was the last lifeline he had. For what it was worth, it probably was at that moment. The metal slid under his hands and he collapsed on the floor, enveloping himself in darkness and porting himself far enough away to safely recover. His mind refused to focus well enough to get him to another room deep within the castle walls, so he landed in the soft grass of the fields that stretched far beyond Castle Oblivion. The same fields that had lured Sora through the front doors at the beginning of this charade.

He had no idea where he was in relation to the castle, but he was alone and that was enough for him.

His body was tired, pushed to its most extreme in the heat of battle. He'd expelled just about everything, and it was barely enough to overcome the raw power of the Keyblade. If Sora had moved just a bit faster or Marluxia a bit slower, there would be a very different story unfolding. However, Marluxia needed to rest and regroup. Collect himself, pluck the broken pieces from the floor, and reconstruct a new, more efficient way to carry out the next leg of his self-proclaimed revolution.

Despite his migraine surging through every inch of his psyche, Marluxia couldn't stop processing and evaluating where he stood. He was waist deep in a black ichor that threatened to swallow him whole and rob him of his purpose. His new purpose? There was a void around him that directly affected what his fate was. Making a mistake at this point was detrimental regardless of the outcome.

If he made the correct assumptions and worked the correct connections in the correct order, he would be fine. Probably fine. One slip of the tongue or sleight of hand, and it was over. The stakes were mounting by the second and there was absolutely nothing Marluxia could do about it. And that...scared him.

Not true fear, he reasoned, fabricated fear. Fear that could do just as much damage whether he was really feeling it or not. It didn't matter in the long run. Experiences were still experiences so long as they were perceived that way. Reality was whatever Marluxia wanted it to be; whatever he imagined it to be. That was the truth.

The only thing that seemed to stagnate was his reasoning. Why had this happened? His superior ranking colleagues had known that this task - this empty position - was meant to be insurmountable. They had known that the outcome was likely going to be the total destruction of half of the organization they touted so specifically. So deliberately. They had been indoctrinated, but Marluxia had been ignorant before. He'd been unaware just how deeply this ran. His previous paranoia had been legitimate. Axel had proven it, but that scumbag had retreated as soon as it was clear that Marluxia had won the ultimate altercation.

In a sense, Marluxia understood. Many of the older, higher ranking members, had their precious tenure and their status and their purpose that was not applied to anyone coming after Axel. Nobodies were devoid of life and feelings and hearts, but they were not devoid of reason. Devoid of logic. This was as much of an issue of status and end goals than an issue of treason.

Axel, who had his own agenda clearly, was inside this circle of tenure and Marluxia was not and that was the biggest obstacle that he faced currently. Whether he wanted to or not, dealing with Axel was the first thing he would have to do. Dealing with Saix would likely come next. Marluxia reasoned that Axel hadn't anticipated what he would do if Marluxia had beaten Sora. That failure to have a backup plan was going to blow up in his face.

Axel admitting that he had betrayed the Organization - undoubtedly on someone's orders - in order to gain the trust of another traitor was akin to exposing his throat to an apex predator. There was no way he had been suspected. Marluxia squeezed his eyes shut. There was no way he was suspected of being an actual traitor prior to this outcome. Xemnas was a manipulator, but he wasn't stupid and he wouldn't have given a powerful weapon to a known traitor. Not even if he was sure that Sora would have won.

Marluxia was in a better situation than he had initially assumed. So long as Axel was taking his sweet time to think of something else, Marluxia could confront him later.

It was mystifying that not even hours ago, Marluxia was a formidable opponent commanding untold strength and power. But now, he was little more than the first day he woke from darkness and was handed a new purpose and someone to train him. Long lashes, petal pink hair, soft lips. All laid out in the grass, an ethereal animal ready to be slaughtered by the first hunter that came along. If anyone found him like this, they would not be merciful and a pseudo fear crawled over him, slurping up the strings of his vacant heart greedily.

The hiss of a corridor of darkness ripped through the silence and Marluxia clamped his mouth shut. The hunter had found him.

He closed his eyes, taking deep and steady breaths, but he did not move. There was no point in trying to run at this moment. Depending on who his visitor was, Marluxia was certain that he was considered a traitor by all accounts. He had a button of leverage though. It wasn't much, but he hadn't really had all that much to begin with, had he? When Marluxia did finally open his eyes again, he was met with the steely blue tip of Sharpshooter, and Xigbar's critical eye scanned him from head to toe.

"You've been a naughty boy," Xigbar said. He was unblinking and did not smile. "Tsk tsk."

"Come to chastise me, I see," Marluxia whispered back, a smirk ghosting across his lips. "Shame on me."

"Caused quite a commotion, Peaches. Shouldn't have done that." Xigbar looked exasperated. "Almost flawless. Almost. I'd hate to admit that I was impressed, but I know you better than you know yourself, remember?" He tapped Marluxia's temple with Sharpshooter.

Marluxia took another deep breath, but it was quiet, lending only a faint whistle through his bloodied nostrils. Of course it would be Xigbar. This was preferable to Axel, or worse, Saix.

"Nothing to say? You always have something to say. Don't hold out on me now. Not while you're straddling the line." Xigbar tapped Marluxia's temple again, cooing encouragement. "Come on now, don't be shy."

"If you're here to kill me, get it over with, Xigbar," Marluxia replied.

"I'm not here specifically to kill you, but I won't hesitate," Xigbar said with a little shrug, "I'm the kind of guy that likes to keep his options open. And I have a lot of emotional investment in you, Peaches."

"Says the one with a gun in my face."

Xigbar gave a little shrug again. "It's hard when you're staring at the product of your hard work. I shaped you into who you pretend to be now and when you go and do something stupid like that shit you just pulled, people notice and they suddenly remember that we have ties. Idiots, but what can you do?"

"I find it hard to relate to your plea," Marluxia remarked. That black ichor was creeping up his chest. "What did you come here for if not to kill me?"

Xigbar snorted, feigning offense. "Can't I have a conversation with my best friend?"

"Last time I checked, I wasn't Xemnas. We're on neutral ground."

"I'm hurt."

Xigbar was beginning to paint a much different picture than what Marluxia had envisioned on his own. The dark tapestry had a few threads coming loose, but that had not garnered suspicion. Marluxia felt his leverage increase a little. He could play dumb, but not too dumb. Xigbar was sharper than he appeared to be, but Marluxia had a few tricks of his own. Honed from years of trying to stay ahead of Xigbar.

"I see," Marluxia breathed. "You made me and now you have to put me down before Xemnas understands the scope of what's changed. Erase a few mistakes along the way, poking and prodding me like you like to. You're here on your own and now you're conflicted. Because you can do whatever you want to me."

"You've still got it, don't you?" Xigbar sounded annoyed, but only a little. Sharpshooter hadn't moved an inch. "So damn observant. Too damn smart. What was I thinking when I picked you?"

Marluxia didn't respond. Xigbar really did act differently around him when nobody was watching and there was nothing to lose. He'd done it before. Plenty of times. When nobody was watching the two of them, there was a spark that dimly passed between them. Xigbar's far stronger than Marluxia's but still present. This was like any other time. The severity of the situation was slightly different because Marluxia wasn't a fresh recruit anymore.

Whether that was the preferred reality remained to be seen.

Xigbar sucked in a breath and moved Sharpshooter away from Marluxia's face, finger off the trigger. "If only you were here a little earlier. Probably would have reached this point a lot sooner. I don't have to like it, but I do have to acknowledge it..." Xigbar closed his eye. "You're a fucking idiot is what you are."

"You sound upset."

Xigbar snorted again, but his stern scowl broke into a familiar smile. "I'm not upset, I'm just disappointed."

"Spare me the drama, Xigbar."

"Oh, I'm sorry," he replied, dismissing his weapon. "I didn't realize that out of all of us, I was the most dramatic."

His voice grew sinister. Marluxia was more trouble than he was worth, but only to very specific people. Xigbar had yet to learn if he was one of those people, but it was starting to look like it. A little bit of corrective guidance wouldn't hurt right about now and he was the best one for the job. He lowered himself until he was sitting on Marluxia's stomach and relished the way the other man flinched at his touch.

Marluxia didn't squirm. His magic was replenishing and his body was knitting itself together, but he was no match for a fight, though he doubted Xigbar actually wanted a fight. Xigbar rarely wanted a fight. He wanted compliance.

"If you were me, what would you be doing right now?" Xigbar asked. "The same thing I'm doing now."

Marluxia's nostrils flared and Xigbar smoothed his fingers along Marluxia's cheeks. There was no response from the lesser. As Xigbar expected.

"I hate having to twist your arm, Peaches," Xigbar cooed. The glint in his eye read savagery and Marluxia's stomach knotted. This was an interrogation, not benign admonishment. "But sometimes, I have to actually take responsibility for my messes. And you're a big mess, kiddo."

Marluxia was furious, but he swallowed that rage immediately. Xigbar was sent to figure out the details. Which meant that Marluxia, though suspicious, was not labeled yet. Which also meant that Axel was still trying to spin his story with no prior planning. Marluxia hadn't anticipated this response so soon, but had planned for it. Of course he had.

He had originally planned for manipulating Sora in the first place. What kind of usurper would he have been if he planned only for failure? Only weak willed creatures planned solely for failure.

"What do you want?" Marluxia breathed back. He didn't like Xigbar's fingers so close to his eyes. "Does he think I'm trying to run now? Xemnas? He's paranoid and you know it."

Xigbar shook his head. "Give credit where credit is due, Peaches. He's paranoid, but rightfully so. Look at what you've been doing, huh? You defeated a Keyblade wielder. What do you think that looks like?"

Marluxia smiled. "Xemnas has lost his mind. I did my _job_."

"You seem awfully confident when you say that. Care to share what's bothering you? I'm a mentor, my lips are sealed."

Only then did Marluxia begin to struggle. Not a lot, but he squirmed. This was what Xigbar wanted. This was a power-play and nothing else. Xemnas was afraid so the muscle had to be exercised. Old habits really did die hard with this leader of theirs. Xigbar grew excited. Yes, Marluxia was squirming, and that previously gentle touch became a firm grip - fingers wrapped around Marluxia's throat.

Marluxia coughed as Xigbar pressed both thumbs into the hollow. Controlled breathing was integral now more than ever. Marluxia had to remain calm, but his heart beat faster in response to the mounting threat.

Xigbar leaned closer to Marluxia's mouth, turning an ear to ensure he didn't miss a word. Not even something under the other's breath. "I'm sorry, think you could repeat that? You sound like you have a little something in your throat."

Thirty seconds later, Xigbar's grip tightened. Marluxia need to wait until the last possible second to make this convincing, but he was toeing a very dangerous line. Too late, and everything would fall apart.

"What do you know?" Xigbar pressed. He really didn't want to kill his protégé. That would have been a waste of time.

Marluxia opened his mouth after another thirty seconds, right before he was about to pass out. Xigbar loosened his grip immediately. "This is rich coming from you."

Xigbar remained stoic. _Come on, Marluxia, spill your guts._

"Your rank protects you," Marluxia wheezed. "Other than Roxas, I'm lowest ranked. I open my mouth and I die. Why risk it?"

Xigbar raised an eyebrow. He hadn't expected that answer. He had hoped for an admission of betrayal, because Marluxia loved gloating about his accomplishments almost as much as Xemnas liked to monologue. It was the thing the two of them had in common.

"You have nothing to lose, you prick," Marluxia continued, spitting the insult. "We all have the same goal, but I'm the one who dies if someone else fucks up, even though I did exactly as Xemnas demanded of me. The Keyblade wielder has been deposed and is ripe for being retooled. What more do you want? I have nothing else to give you."

"Vexen is dead," Xigbar replied. “I know you couldn’t stand the guy.”

"I had nothing to do with that. You have a little rat scurrying around in your kitchen, Xigbar. The arrogant ass is sitting right under your nose and you never saw him. Because you can't stop looking at me. Good job investigating the wrong lead. Better make sure he hasn't run off with your tools before you fuck something else up."

Xigbar glared at Marluxia, unblinking. Marluxia stared right back, gold to blue, for a long time. Xigbar couldn't tell if Marluxia was lying or not. In this position, a lot of Marluxia's reasoning made sense. Despite being immensely powerful - and proving it - Marluxia was the second lowest ranked. He had been given a lot of responsibility based solely on who trained him and how he handled his missions. Even if the position was a false one, it had served its purpose. He had been useful.

Even now, he was useful.

"Axel." Xigbar stood up. When Marluxia didn’t try to get up after him, Xigbar looked down. “Don’t worry, I’ll be back.”

“My excitement is indescribable.”

“That’s a good boy.”

Marluxia relaxed into the grass as Xigbar disappeared. This was a calculated risk and Marluxia worried that his bluff would be called. To him, it sounded perfect. Axel was already a traitor. The fact that Marluxia was also a traitor was irrelevant if Axel was discredited first. Given Xigbar's reaction, that was probably the case. He had very narrowly saved his own ass.

It took him a while to get back into working order. His magic, though still critically low, had pooled enough for him to be able to move more freely. His body ached, but the sharp pains had dulled and Marluxia forced himself into a sitting position. It was likely not a good idea to head to the Castle That Never Was just yet. He had loose ends to tie up in Castle Oblivion, and if he was going to keep his bluff credible, he was going to have to clean up the mess he left behind.

He stood up and stepped through a corridor of darkness, back into the same room he had defeated Sora in. Sora was gone, likely taken by Xigbar or even Xemnas himself. All that was left were the sparse smears of blood and cracked tiles from the fight. It felt a little unreal, to be standing in his throne room with no real power. Larxene was dead, and Marluxia realized that he was the only one left standing.

Maybe.

That investigation would have to come another day. For now, Marluxia was going to do a little poking around remotely. Xigbar not returning was a positive sign, but it could easily come back to bite him on the ass. He made his way down a few floors, inspecting damage done and looking for information. Vexen was dead as well, but that did not mean that all his research and life's work was gone.

Zexion and Lexaeus could be dealt with if it came down to it. He hoped that it wouldn't. He also, oddly enough, hoped that it would. Surely after understanding the scope of Axel's betrayal, they would be realigning themselves. Xemnas never had their best interests in mind, or at least, it looked that way from his perspective. Perhaps he was biased.

"Skulking around still?"

Marluxia froze. That was Xigbar's voice and he wondered how long the Freeshooter had been following him. Xigbar being out of sight was something to be feared. There was no way to tell if he was standing in the crosshairs.

“My job is not finished,” Marluxia replied, fighting back every urge to locate the other. He took a small step forward. “I have damage control and clean up to handle.”

“Don’t move.”

Marluxia inhaled deeply through his nose. That sounded like a threat. He was standing in Xigbar’s crosshairs. Fuck…

“Kept your options open?”

Xigbar chuckled darkly. “If you want to say it like that, you can. Your story checked out. Which is an amazing stroke of luck for you, isn’t it? Quite unlike you to have luck so conveniently.”

“You don’t believe me.” Marluxia’s mind nearly froze in panic. He still couldn’t face Xigbar while he was this weak. There wasn’t enough magic to even have half a chance. “Is that what it is? Axel turns out to be a traitor and you’re still looking at me?”  
  
Silence.  
  
“You want me to make an educated guess now, right? Is that why you’re taunting me now? Haven’t had enough fun yet?” Marluxia could feel his stomach knotting up again and the urge to panic was rising. This wasn’t right. Something wasn’t right.  
  
“You feel it,” Xigbar said. His voice was closer than it had been before. “After all this time, you finally understand what’s going on around you. That, Peaches, is called fear.”  
  
Marluxia wouldn’t admit it, but his body was trembling. He was terrified, and it was real. Beads of sweat collected along his brow and his hands wouldn’t stop shaking even while curled into defensive fists. The very idea of being helpless to defend himself from Xigbar was maddening. And exhilarating.  
  
“This is not supposed to happen,” Marluxia said. “This isn’t real. You’ve always known how to push my buttons.”  
  
“As true as that may be, you’re smart enough to know that lying to yourself isn’t going to work. Though it is a little funny to see you respond this way. I was so sure it was going to be rage. Bets are off.”  
  
Marluxia had to pull himself back from that edge. Feelings. Real ones. Without a heart? That wasn’t possible. There was no way he had a heart.  
  
Xigbar sighed. “You won’t be able to rationalize it without some specific files. Specific files I’m sure you were looking for just now. Perhaps files belonging to a recently deceased colleague of yours, hmm?”  
  
He knew. He knew that Marluxia had bluffed and Marluxia paled considerably.  
  
“No need to get all spooked, Peaches. I’m still calling you by your beloved nickname, aren’t I?”  
  
Was this another bluff? Marluxia blinked and finally decided to look for Xigbar. He turned around slowly and there was nothing but the white stretches of hallway. So it was like that.  
  
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Marluxia replied finally, willing himself to stop trembling.  
  
“Cut the bullshit, Marluxia,” Xigbar shot back. “I know you. I know you are bluffing. There was no way that you could have known that Axel was the traitor. And that he was in bed with Saix. No way. Not you.”  
  
“I knew Axel was a traitor the moment he killed Vexen in an attempt to gain my trust,” Marluxia said. “I had no idea until that moment and I had no idea anything related to Saix. I will not claim that I did. But that is not why you are here.  
  
“Because you’re looking at me again. That half lidded lustful stare. The one you think I don’t see.”  
  
“Too. Damn. Smart.”  
  
Xigbar appeared in front of Marluxia in a whirl of darkness. There was no weapon present. Just him. Just Xigbar.  
  
"You don't need to flinch, Peaches," he said, reaching out for the other, who without thinking, flinched. "I'm not going to hurt you."

How could he not? Xigbar made it seem like he was going to kill him. Made it seem like he had every intention of calling the bluff and forcing him to suffer the consequences. Marluxia was unable to fight, but he wouldn't hesitate to at least try. Xigbar frowned. He hated doing this. Marluxia was his protégé and everything they had ever done was leading up to this point. That didn't sit well with him given certain implications.

He didn't even know what to say.

"I don't doubt you," Xigbar said finally. Marluxia still hadn't come to him and it was his fault for being so rough. It was easy to forget that Marluxia took a specific hand to deal with in times of vulnerability. How could he have forgotten? Shame on him. "Stubborn, aren't you?"

"You made me this way," Marluxia replied, subtle confidence lacing through his words. "I had no choice but to learn. More than you wanted. But that's why you recruited me, isn't it? You wanted this. You needed this. Because nobody else can compare."

"Alright, you've cornered me," Xigbar admitted, holding his hands up, palms visible. "I'm totally smitten - can't stop looking at you, even though you bite. I walk a dangerous line every day. Though s'not my fault that I can appreciate all aspects of you."

Marluxia snorted. "Are you flirting with me?"

"Might be."

The tension had eased. Finally, the two of them could take a breath. No suspicions, no bluffs, no lies.

"You're bad at it," Marluxia said, turning away.

"But I've still managed to get you every time," Xigbar responded almost immediately. "It's definitely my good looks that keeps you coming. Or maybe my excellent technique."

Marluxia flushed. It seemed that the longer the two had known each other, the more flustered Marluxia would be when Xigbar acted like this. He couldn't really deny it either. He was attracted to Xigbar, that asshole, always getting in the way. They both knew it, but it was much more fun to play games than be straight forward. Perhaps it was a vain attempt to see who was more stubborn of the two, but it felt more like who would have the final one-up over the other.

"Xigbar, I'm wounded."

"About that. Can I take a look?"

Marluxia blinked slowly. They were standing in the middle of the hallway and Xigbar was a very hands on person. The idea was tempting, but now was not a good time. He took a deep breath and ported away, into privacy where nobody else would see just how much damage had been done. It was hard to admit and even harder to act upon, but Xigbar was the only one Marluxia trusted not harm him now. Whether that was wise didn't matter anymore.

Xigbar wasn't that far behind, though while he did have those precious few seconds, his expression softened. What would he do if Marluxia wasn't so ready to defend himself? Even while wounded and struggling, Marluxia had that grace and that angelic beauty and Xigbar hated that they had to work like this. Keep each other on their toes and ready for struggle at any moment.

Now was not a good time to change that, and there likely would never be a good time to do so. Not in this reality. Maybe in a different life...

"Let's see what's going on."

Marluxia turned back and Xigbar carefully approached. He pulled his gloves off and let them fall to the floor. This was going to require the gentlest touch he could muster. Marluxia was hesitant, obviously so, but when Xigbar took his face into his hands, Marluxia let him. And he relaxed for perhaps the first time in a very long time.

Suddenly all the pain and tenderness that he had been distracted from surged back to the forefront of his mind. He was not rested, and had not healed. As soon as he had reached the bare minimum to get back up and start going again, he'd done so. He regretted it now.

"Hurts?" Xigbar asked.

"I'm fine," Marluxia said through grit teeth. "Don't you dare pretend to pity me."

"Is it really pity when you're barely keeping yourself composed? Haven't seen you like this before."

"Yes, rub it in," Marluxia growled, placing his hands on Xigbar's shoulders. He tried not to let it show, but he was steadying himself against the other. With nothing to focus on, he was buckling under the weight of his own exhaustion. He couldn't go down in front of Xigbar. He couldn't.

His breathing was labored. Marluxia was nothing if not stubborn, and he would keep himself together until he literally didn't have the energy. He'd rather die. In fact, he almost had. This mentality was the only reason he'd been able to come out on top in his fight with Sora, and he would overcome this too. Xigbar didn't push him, but Marluxia could sense the thin film of worry glossing over Xigbar's eye. He could feel it.

"Stop being such a stubborn ass," Xigbar whispered. "I already told you I'm not going to hurt you."

But Marluxia didn't believe him. All the years of lying and misdirection made Marluxia paranoid. Ironic, considering he had just accused Xemnas of the same thing. Perhaps that was what they really had in common. He couldn't believe Xigbar. He couldn't.

Marluxia's grip on Xigbar's shoulders tightened and he groaned as he leaned into the other. He was going to push him away; he was going to stand his ground in stubbornness, but as soon as he had wound himself up, Marluxia lost all his steam. His knees buckled and Xigbar awkwardly caught him. That stubbornness would have to live to fight another day.

\---

He had no idea how much time had passed. An hour? A day? Longer? All he knew was that he was alone, and he was in The Castle That Never Was. And alive somehow. That was at least one positive sign. Everything else was in the air.

"Told you, Peaches."

"Is that how you plan to greet me from now on?" Marluxia replied. "Without showing yourself? I thought I would have gained more respect from you by now."

"Respect comes in many different flavors."

Xigbar appeared half a second later. Command over the very fabric of space had a lot of perks. Marluxia gathered that this was one of the flashier ones.

"Welcome back to consciousness," Xigbar said. He pulled up a chair and sat down. Marluxia watched with a hint of malice in his eyes. Time for another fucking mind game. Xigbar raised an eyebrow. "You don't have to look so glum."

"I faltered," Marluxia whispered harshly.

"And nothing bad happened, right?" Xigbar asked slyly. "I thought you would be jumping for joy."

"That's not possible."

"There's a lot of things that aren't supposed to be possible."

"What do you want?" Marluxia hissed. He was getting defensive. That moment of weakness was just that - a moment. He had learned early on that folding was an inexcusable offense if one was trying to get somewhere. He was embarrassed and his face reddened. "To humiliate me?"

"Only if you're into that."

"Be serious."

"Oh, I am, Peaches." Xigbar leaned back a bit. Marluxia, the ever flustered asshole with a mastermind's view of the world. He could reach out and take it right now if he wanted. Marluxia was a mule, but he was also flexible when he wanted to be. "I need to look you over."

"Right, that's where we left off, wasn't it?" Marluxia purred back, smile sensual and all knowing. "We aren't hidden behind our secretive walls anymore, love. You might want to be careful." That was a mistake, and a rather stupid one at that.

Xigbar snorted. "As if. You'd melt in my hands. I already feel it. You can hardly resist."

"I'd say the same of you but that would be disrespectful."

"Touché."

Marluxia took a deep breath, staring at Xigbar with a mix of confusion and an indescribable sadness. His suspicions were proving to be bothersome. And the only thing he could not fathom, was why. Xigbar let Marluxia wonder for a little bit, but he only moved closer when Marluxia came back out of his headspace.

"It's different now--"

"Kiss me."

Xigbar blinked. "Before I do that, I want to look you over."

"Fine."

"Face me."

Marluxia bunched the sheets in his hands and turned so his feet were flat on the floor. It took him a moment; clearly his injuries still hadn't fully healed. Xigbar took Marluxia's face into his hands again, but unlike every other time, Marluxia didn't move away. And he didn’t flinch. Xigbar brushed along the small cuts and bruises, flashes of worry hiding behind his picture perfect poker face. Marluxia was none the wiser.

But there was something gentle about the way Xigbar looked at all Marluxia's wounds, determining something, analyzing. He was drinking in information but Marluxia couldn't find the will to even care. He winced when it hurt, huffed when it didn't and grew more and more impatient. Xigbar took his sweet time, as he feared that maybe this would be the last time he got to have Marluxia in this way. The last time he would feel his smooth skin and soak in his company.

Because even if he would never say it, he really did respect Marluxia's ambition. It was a pain in the ass to deal with when Xemnas was getting antsy, but it was still admirable. The only other to even attempt was going about it all wrong.

Marluxia, eyes closed, relished the feeling of Xigbar's hands on him. Rough, calloused. The hands of a hard worker. It had been far too long since the last time they spent time together like this. That bastard was right though. He really did melt almost the second he was being handled. This was unfair.

"You. Are. Incredible," Xigbar whispered. "Absolutely incredible."

"Amazed by the mundane as usual," Marluxia whispered back. He stood hesitantly, but his aches and pains dulled a bit. He was distracted from them.

"I don't think there's anything mundane about you, Peaches."

Xigbar sank back into the seat and made room for Marluxia to straddle him. The man was growing impatient - perhaps even more so than Marluxia - but he couldn't go in for any kills just yet. He'd have to get permission first. Marluxia settled on him and let his hair fall over his shoulders to tickle Xigbar's cheeks.

Marluxia was so beautiful it should have been considered a crime. It took everything Xigbar had to be gentle. Every ounce of that willpower Nobodies were known for. But he craved it. He craved having absolute control over that beauty. Absolute control over his fate. He'd even admit that it turned him on that he could turn this power hungry murderer into a pining mess and back again.

There were few things he could do better.

"Contemplating?"

Xigbar grunted an affirmation and Marluxia kissed him. Oh, how he longed for this moment. To not have to keep up appearances and charades and dance around the topic. He was here, in the present, straddling the line and he loved it. Xigbar kissed him back, and they grew more passionate as words muffled between them and all that could be heard was soft intakes of breath whenever pain lanced through Marluxia's body.

He adored the feeling of Xigbar's hands in his hair, the warmth that coiled between them, and the occasional flashes of pain. He liked it. Though Xigbar hadn't been the one to inflict this pain, it felt good to know that at any moment, he could. Sometimes he faltered and Xigbar whispered concern, but Marluxia would cut him off.

Don't stop.

And Xigbar wouldn't. In fact, he got rougher, holding and squeezing every inch of Marluxia he could get his hands on. He had a firm grip, like he had no intention of ever letting Marluxia get away from him again. This was perfect. This was right.

Marluxia's hair was a mess and he quickly pulled it all over one shoulder. He was fully flushed, cheeks and shoulders a delicate red. Eyes half lidded and lustful. Eager. If he had made any demands, Xigbar was reasonably sure that he would have given Marluxia whatever had been asked for. Almost without question.

"I'm so tired, love," he said. "I don't know if I can be what you want me to be for right now, but that doesn't mean this has to be fruitless."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Use your imagination."

Xigbar immediately saw Marluxia kneeling in front of him. It had been a request for a long time. Hinted at, asked for, nearly begged for. Up until this moment, it had always been a firm no, but Xigbar was the kind of guy to always keep his options open. Marluxia watched him in his internal struggle, and when Xigbar gave a slow but unquestioned nod, a smile crept onto his perfect lips.

Finally.

"You just saw what you wanted," Marluxia said, confident. "Don't you just wish you could actually do it? All talk, no action. I bet it's filthy. The filthiest thing you've ever imagined." He leaned closer until his lips were barely touching Xigbar's ear. "I know what you're thinking, Xigbar. I know. So why don't you just do it?"

He had one arm draped around Xigbar's shoulders and all his weight was on Xigbar's body. He was pining. Very carefully, but he was pining. He had his other hand smoothing down Xigbar's chest, pulling at the fabric of his shirt. This was all part of the show. All part of being a tease and Xigbar was hooked. Marluxia could feel Xigbar's cock hardening.

"Be careful what you wish for, Peaches," Xigbar said. Marluxia kissed him again.

"I know exactly what I'm doing." Another kiss. "I'm more experienced than you think. Isn't that funny?"

"Then get on the floor," Xigbar growled.

Marluxia sighed wistfully and slid all the way to the cool floor, taking his sweet time to settle into an acceptable position. Xigbar was bursting at the seams. He just wanted to grab Marluxia's hair. Put this pain in the ass to work since he was so ready, but he found that he didn't have to, as Marluxia wasn't stupid and played into Xigbar's desires. Very smart.

"You've always wanted this," Marluxia said, rolling his hand over Xigbar's cock. "You could have had it a long time ago, you know."

"Keep thinking that you know me like that, Peaches. It's adorable."

"Adorable?" Marluxia stifled a chuckle. "Of course. You know everything, isn't that right?"

He smiled softly, reaching for Xigbar's button and zipper and very slowly unzipping his pants, making sure to milk this moment for everything it was worth. Xigbar was impatient and commanding and Marluxia knew that once they reached the point of no return, it was going to be an interesting few minutes for the both of them. Marluxia's stomach twisted around in place and he pulled Xigbar's cock free of all the fabric.

He stroked carefully. Xigbar shifted in place, spreading his legs a bit wider and giving Marluxia ample room to move. Marluxia’s arrogance was unmistakable, and his fingers fleeting. Xigbar was on his turf now.

"It's taken so long to get to this point, it's a wonder you haven't jumped yet," Marluxia said, circling his thumb over the swollen head of Xigbar’s cock. "That's what you're going to do, isn't it? You want to fuck this mouth. Shut me the fuck up."

Xigbar's cheeks warmed. "Can't get anything past you, can I?"

"You have yet to, I'm afraid."

Xigbar snorted, "We'll see."

Marluxia picked up his pace, eliciting a strained moan from his superior’s mouth. Xigbar was trying. But Marluxia’s hand was masterful, barely touching Xigbar, but still having just enough pressure to funnel that impatience. He was delighted to see the look on Xigbar's face. A mixture of “get on with it” and “if you stop doing this I will destroy you”.

The other was unfazed. Marluxia’s smile only grew wider and more sultry until he placed his lips on Xigbar’s cock. Xigbar, pushed Marluxia’s head away and rose to his feet much to Marluxia’s false surprise.

“Impatient, are we?” Marluxia remarked snidely. “Tsk Tsk.”

Xigbar scoffed. “You knew this was coming.”

“Did I?”

Xigbar ran his fingers through Marluxia’s hair a few times before pulling his shirt off. He was hot, burning, and he wasn’t going to wait any longer for Marluxia to tease him. With a grunt, Marluxia removed his shirt as well, exposing all the bruises along his sides and back. That didn’t matter now. None of it did.

“Shut the fuck up.”

Marluxia’s smile was nearly wicked and it smacked of insubordination. He licked his lips expectantly and narrowed his eyes in a direct challenge. His voice was warm honey. “Make me.”

Xigbar took a fistful of Marluxia’s feathery soft hair, and pried his mouth open with his thumb. Marluxia licked the intruding digit and not even a whole second later, Xigbar had his cock in Marluxia’s mouth.

This was corrective guidance. This was what Xigbar should have done earlier. This is what he should have done when they had their private room in Castle Oblivion.

It was everything he had imagined. Warm, wet, and quiet. His motions were easy, forgiving. Couldn’t get too into it too quick, could he? Marluxia was completely compliant, relaxing into his own rhythm to match Xigbar. His only focus was pleasure.

It took time, but the two of them lined up with one another, Marluxia holding onto Xigbar’s hips and sliding his pants down, Xigbar paying close attention to when Marluxia needed air. He was building slowly, very slowly. It singed the edges of his psyche, and he sweat with restraint.

If anybody saw them this way, there was no telling what kind of hell would be unleashed.

Marluxia doted every last ounce of attention on Xigbar’s cock. With each push in, he made sure to take as much as he possibly could before Xigbar pulled out, licking and sucking eagerly. All without a word. He was gorgeous, perfectly wrapped around Xigbar’s cock where he belonged.

Xigbar let Marluxia guide him, but when he felt Marluxia’s hand cup his balls, his skin flushed. Yes, keep at it. Xigbar moaned lowly. He was not the vocal type, but he couldn’t help it. The timing was too perfect. He moved faster, giving tiny little thrusts between his long strokes.

His mind was in a fog, he was trying to focus on so many things at once and Marluxia’s low hums weren’t helping. Even with a dick in his mouth, Marluxia couldn’t be quiet. Xigbar thrust a little faster, harder. Deeper. And Marluxia took it.

“You sound so much better this way,” Xigbar murmured. Words barely forming through his concentration.

Marluxia felt Xigbar slow down a little bit. He was more forceful, his grip in his hair tighter. Moans deeper and lower. Marluxia relaxed into Xigbar and felt the head of his cock touch the back of his throat.

“Don’t you choke, Peaches,” Xigbar huffed. “I’m going slow.”

Each time Xigbar hit the back of his throat, Marluxia was allowed to breathe. Xigbar’s stamina was waning, and after a few more thrusts, Xigbar came, voice low. Marluxia hadn’t choked, but it was hard not to make a sound as he swallowed that warmth.

As soon as Xigbar pulled out, he pulled his pants up and went to pour Marluxia a much needed glass of water. Marluxia merely sat there, drained. That had taken more out of him than he had expected.

“Drink.” Xigbar offered the glass.

Marluxia accepted the glass and sipped it quietly. After he nearly emptied it, he handed it back to Xigbar. “Did you like it?”

Xigbar hummed, face still reddened. “I think I understand the appeal now. But, it’s not the same when you’re not moaning my name. You sound good when you’re quiet, but I miss your voice.”

He helped Marluxia to his feet. Marluxia winced a little at having to exert so much energy, but he remained elegant. He leaned on Xigbar and brushed his lips against his ear, voice barely above a heady whisper.

“Oh, _Xigbar_ ,” Marluxia breathed. “I’m sure you’ll make it up to me. After all, you’re always in my way, aren’t you?”

“You know it, Peaches.” Xigbar replied. ”I’ll be back when you have the stamina. Can’t handle it otherwise.”

“My excitement is indescribable.”

“That’s what I like to hear.”


	2. How Far It Spreads

Marluxia spent most of the next few days healing from his wounds. With Vexen executed, the only one who could handle any sort of medical treatment was Zexion, and he was very quick with follow-ups and medicinal applications. Marluxia didn’t exactly blame him, considering the rumors that had undoubtedly surfaced without his intervention.

It was hard to keep track of what was going on when he could barely keep his eyes open for longer than a few hours. However, once he was able to walk without incident, Marluxia was dismissed from the makeshift medical ward to go about whatever business awaited him.

The castle was eerily quiet. Marluxia assumed that it would be with him wandering around, but a lot had changed in the last few days and there was a new political battleground that was forming underfoot. He had little control over it, but it was soon going to be the battle that he ate, breathed, and slept. A rough terrain that held no allies and about ten enemies. Maybe even more. 

He opened the door to his room to find it in exactly the same condition he had left it. Tidy, simple, and empty. He wasn’t going to have much to occupy his mind while he showered, dressed, and prepared for what lay ahead. Certainly, he would have another mission to take care of, or some kind of menial grunt work waiting for him. Handed out by Saix.

Or maybe not.

Xigbar had mentioned that Saix and Axel had been working together in some capacity. That Saix was a traitor as well, but Marluxia doubted any sort of consequences had fallen on the dragon. The gatekeeper to what could and couldn’t be accomplished.

There was really only one way to find out, and when Marluxia departed to the Grey Area, Saix was standing in his usual spot, with the usual unreadable expression on his face. Saix, Marluxia noted, looked agitated. The agitation was veiled under indifference, but it was still there.

Saix was deliberate in his displays and didn’t stray very far from a few false emotions. False emotions that were likely a ruse. Marluxia’s experience with Xigbar during their little “information session” told a different story. Xigbar, one of the oldest members, could feel. Marluxia, as it turned out, could also feel but not quite to the capacity that Xigbar could.

Those were real emotions and no matter how he rationalized it, Xigbar was right. He couldn’t lie to himself any more than Xigbar could lie to him. As the eleventh into the fold, Marluxia’s emotions were weak and flighty. Even now, it was hard to remember what gut wrenching fear felt like. It was chaotic and irrational but it had appeared and that was enough evidence for him. 

For now.

But Saix was the seventh and was essentially Xemnas’s right hand. At least when it came to operations and administrative duties. Could Saix feel as well? Most likely as far as Marluxia was concerned, but it wasn’t supposed to be known. 

Why? 

There was a vague sense of uneasiness as Marluxia hurried to Saix.

“Saix,” Marluxia said as he approached. “My apologies for the delay. I’m sure you are aware.”

Saix did not respond and Marluxia took a deep breath through his nostrils. This was the second obstacle he had to overcome after all, and he had no idea what Saix knew. This was going to be quite the challenge indeed.

The lack of open hostility was a good sign to begin with. Though Saix appeared to be hiding agitation, he had never been the type to keep his agitation from the source of it. Whatever the source of Saix’s clenched jaw and narrowed eyes, Marluxia was not it. Which was interesting considering the last few events that had taken place.

Xigbar must not have said anything to incriminate him further.

“Good to see you finally in working order,” Saix said tersely, leafing through a few files – missions. “Your last mission was an overwhelming success, so Xemnas has decided to extend your stay in Castle Oblivion.”

Saix handed a file to Marluxia. It was thin, unlike the last one he had been given. He didn’t crack it open just yet, as Saix hadn’t dismissed him.

“Sora’s disappeared,” he continued, eyebrows twitching. Ah, so that was the source. “We suspect that because of his status as Keyblade wielder, some kind of magic we hadn’t anticipated is at play here. Xigbar is already exploring some of the possibilities. You are going to join him.”

Marluxia nodded. “Anything specific I should know before I leave?”

Saix blinked a few times and his brows furrowed in concentration. He was reading Marluxia and Marluxia knew it. It was clear that though Saix had not been punished, the implications of Marluxia’s admission to Xigbar had not reached the dragon’s ears. If it had, Marluxia would have been having a much different conversation with a much stronger adversary.

“Axel has gone rogue,” he said. “He was a traitor to the Organization and Xemnas suspects he may try to strike us while in the aftermath of losing two or three powerful members. Be prepared to defend yourself if he shows up.”

“Of course.”

“Then you are dismissed,” Saix replied. “Xemnas anticipates a report as a soon as you have something substantial. Shouldn’t be too difficult.”

Saix disappeared in an oval of darkness and Marluxia was left alone in the Grey Area with only the fullness of the moon to keep him company. It was noticeably fuller compared to when he had left, but it was not quite a complete creation.

This was what all these missions had been about. Encouraging the completion of this cryptic object that was meant to restore them to their former selves. Or at least that was what Xemnas made it seem like. Marluxia didn’t think that Xemnas’s word was the truth anymore, and if Saix hadn’t been in the same league as Axel, then Marluxia had reason to believe that Xemnas had a greater deal of control over him. Absolute it seemed.

There were pieces missing. Holes in explanations and logical deductions. Xigbar probably had most of if not all the answers squirreled away where nobody would find them.

That was another issue to add to the growing list of obstacles that Marluxia was faced with. There was nothing that could be done now, so Marluxia filed it away before enveloping himself in darkness and returning once again to Castle Oblivion’s throne room.

It still had that noted lack of authority. The Lord of Castle was no longer a title that mattered now that Sora was deposed. However, something about Saix’s description of the mission bothered him. Sora was gone, but he wasn’t under the Organization’s control.

Marluxia decided to open the file now. The only thing written within it were leads meant to be followed, and a couple cards. He was familiar with them – they were the same cards given to Sora – but he had no idea how these were supposed to help.

Was he expected to investigate world cards? Whose memories created these?

He removed the world cards and slipped them into an inner pocket. Marluxia wasn’t going to explore the worlds provided just yet, lest this be another test presented to him. He had to finish his snooping around before he could do that.

Xigbar had mentioned files created by Vexen. Marluxia was interested in seeing if Vexen’s temporary lab was still intact, and if it was, he desperately wanted to see what he could find. He had been sent back for an unknown reason and believed he had a finite amount of time to figure it out before Xigbar was on his trail again.

If he wasn’t already.

Marluxia would have to be careful for the time being. He wasn’t alone in the castle, though, that much he knew. Zexion had tended to his medical conditions, but on a strict schedule and had no other interactions. Zexion was hard worker, a thorough one, but he was also efficient. If he had nothing else assigned to him, Marluxia certainly would have seen him around more often.

However, while Marluxia had a modicum of privacy, he would do everything in his power to find where Vexen worked. It was likely in the lower levels of the castle, if not the basement. Marluxia figured starting on the fourth floor and working his way down would have made the most sense.

Vexen was brutally intelligent, but also deplorably predictable. A lab on the fourth floor would have fit him perfectly.

Though as Marluxia worked his way through every inch of that level, he found nothing. And there was nothing on the third, second, or ground floors either. The silence was maddening. If he really was working in a castle with others, why had nobody spoken to him yet? Zexion would have made his presence known surely. At the very least.

He'd have no choice but to work his way down further.

“Peaches, it really is pathetic to see you wandering around like this.”

Xigbar appeared near the entrance of the ground floor. He was unarmed, but Marluxia still hesitated in approaching. He was supposed to be working with Xigbar, certainly, but that didn’t mean anything when Xigbar was supposed the be investigating Sora’s disappearance.

Which, of course, Marluxia had nothing to do with.

“Not even an acknowledgment? I guess I really did shut you up.”

Marluxia sneered. “I’m working, Xigbar. You of all people should know I take my job seriously. But you wouldn’t know anything about that, would you?”

“Five seconds into the conversation and you’re already insulting me.” Xigbar wiped a pretend tear away and covered his heart. “I have been nothing if not helpful.”

“Interrogating me and exercising your power over me is not helpful,” Marluxia replied. Venom dripped from his teeth. “Stop following me around.”

“You know,” Xigbar said, circling Marluxia, “I was under the impression we are supposed to be working together. Not feeling very cooperative? Still looking for something, yeah? Shame.”

Marluxia tensed. “You investigate your leads, I investigate mine. Leave me alone.”

“You’re cute when you’re deflecting. You should do it more often. People might not suspect you as much if you were cuter.”

“Please.”

Xigbar shrugged. “Hey now, we’re on the same side, remember? You and me both work for the big man with all the strings attached. Maybe you could actually make an ally in this mess you’ve made for yourself.”

“I don’t see how completing my mission successfully was a means to make a mess for myself. You’d almost think that if the end goal was for me to die, it would have been executed differently.”

Marluxia looked Xigbar up and down. Not a word from the other and he couldn’t determine if that was a good thing or not. Xigbar was fucking with him. That had to be the only explanation. The only reason he kept showing up outside of his twisted idea of flirting.

“You’re right,” Xigbar said. “You are absolutely right. And yet, here you stand. You, me, lots of empty space. Still alive. Being a pain in the ass as usual. Am I convincing you of anything yet?”

Marluxia sighed. “Have you found anything?”

“Not a thing.”

“So you bothering me is pointless.”

“Slow down there, Peaches,” Xigbar said. “I wasn’t hinting at that. I know you’ve got yourself a couple of cards to go along with your file.”

“And spying on me.”

Xigbar scoffed. “You do your job and I’ll do mine. Or you could be a doll and tell me why you’re looking for what you’re looking for. Would make this a lot easier on both of us.”

Absolutely not. Marluxia wouldn’t dare reveal his motives or what he was looking for even though he was certain Xigbar knew and was just being a pain about it. Xigbar always seemed to know what was going on and rarely did anything to change it. There was still no chance in hell and Xigbar could sense it.

“I thought so,” he muttered. “In that case, let me offer you a hand. You won’t find what you’re looking for because I already took it. Can’t trust me after everything we’ve been through? I am offended and you should be grateful I’m not malicious.”

_Liar…_

“Vexen’s research is a closely guarded secret,” he continued. “That, and you were out for a few days which is more than enough time to move all the trash from one castle to another. Did you know he used to write his notes upside down and backwards to stop people from reading his research? Silly man.”

“That’s not what I was looking for,” Marluxia replied.

“Sure, Peaches.”

Marluxia continued to make his way to the immaculate curved staircase that wound down to the lower levels. There was an odd but deliberate shift in tone between the ground floor and the basement, and Marluxia ignored Xigbar’s stare. He felt those needles under his skin. Xigbar was onto him.

“I’ll come around once you’ve finished snooping in an empty room. Try not to miss me.”

Marluxia glared at Xigbar until the very last wisps of darkness were gone. There was no way Xigbar had actually left him alone, but now Marluxia was convinced that Vexen’s research had been about hearts. Their hearts.

Perhaps in a vague connection to Sora’s. Of course there was no way to know until he had his hands on those documents. Wouldn’t be too difficult to decipher if Xigbar’s offhanded comment was true. Upside down and backwards.

Marluxia returned to his snooping, but he had to throw Xigbar off his trail for the time being. He was beginning to believe that Xigbar didn’t want him looking for those documents because he wanted to find them first.

_Paranoia. That’s the paranoia talking._

He had to shake it. He couldn’t let that creep up on him while he was preoccupied with the newest task at hand. He’d pushed the black ichor away after his injuries had healed and he was kneeling before Xigbar with his mouth open.

What a stupid thing to do. What a careless mistake. Xigbar suspected Marluxia still and was trying to either use him to gain information for Xemnas, or was trying to use him to gain information for something else.

Marluxia’s throat tightened. What if this wasn’t about Xemnas at all?

He shook his head, running his hands through his hair. He felt crazy. Lost in a sea of uncertainty and he was sure that the castle was playing tricks on him. That’s what it was supposed to do. It was supposed to rob the inhabitants of their memories. It was supposed to confuse them, misdirect them. Observe them.

Those world cards were burning a hole in his pocket. He’d have to use them eventually.

His report to Xemnas was going to have to reflect his exploration. Perhaps he was supposed to be working with Xigbar in that respect. Xigbar wouldn’t be able to move on unless Marluxia used a card.

That asshole could stand to wait a little bit longer.

The staircase into the basement was beckoning to him, reaching for him with gnarled fingers. There were secrets hidden in the walls and behind closed doors. Marluxia wanted nothing more than to know what they were, but he couldn’t roam when he had to keep his façade up. He’d bluffed so he had to keep it going at all costs.

At least until he could get into Xemnas’s closest circle and kill him. Or whatever he was actually going to do. He was treading new territory and he had to fill in the holes before he made his next move.

For now, all Marluxia knew was that Sora was missing and that Xemnas didn’t have him. Maybe if he navigated carefully enough, he would be able to find Sora and use him as intended. Before Xigbar found Vexen’s documents and before Xemnas caught on to what was happening under his nose.

He wouldn’t be able to ignore it for much longer. The world cards. They were mumbling to him, picking at the edges of his soul and begging him to indulge in his curiosities unchained. The freedom to wander into the memory’s eye where nothing could stop him and nothing could contain him.

Marluxia closed his eyes. This was a test on Xemnas’s part. It absolutely had to be.

In a stroke of inspiration – and perhaps more concentrated paranoia – Marluxia disappeared through a corridor of darkness and reappeared in a rectangular room. It carried much of the attributes of the castle at large, but had a distinct bluer hue to the white walls, which were covered in colorful pictures.

The pillars that lined each side were meticulously carved and though some of the capitals had been defaced by an unknown force, the room was pristine. There was a long table in the middle of the room, several chairs haphazardly shoved under the table in a rush. There was only one place setting.

“Namine,” Marluxia called. He tried to keep his tone level, but there was a tiny inflection that betrayed his worry.

Almost immediately, Namine appeared from behind a door that sat on the other end of the room. She looked gentle, caring, and perhaps a little indifferent. She was a Nobody after all, even if she was unique in her creation.

“Where’s Sora?” Marluxia asked.

Namine’s voice was much more telling than her face. It was raspy, sad, and her bottom lip trembled in equal parts sorrow and terror. “I don’t know…”

He wasn’t going to attack her, though her cues were telling. She was expecting punishment. Perhaps Larxene had been a bit heavy handed with her intimidation tactics. Things were different now; the circumstances had changed violently and Namine was the only pawn he still had at his disposal.

Namine didn’t pick up on Marluxia’s worry. She watched Marluxia pace and clasped her hands together. She had honestly expected him to lash out. To yell and scream and loom over her. Bully her into giving him answers. She wouldn’t admit it, but she was relieved that he hadn’t.

Relieved…and worried. Sora’s connection to her had severed. She’d been meddling in his memories for so long, she was afraid that he had died and his heart couldn’t remember who he was anymore. And that would have been entirely her fault.

Even the drawings she was able to create seemed to have vanished from her mind’s eye. Everything she attempted grew into a dripping black mess, no matter the medium. She couldn’t decipher what she saw in her pseudo dreams anymore and that was alarming because it had happened so suddenly.

Perhaps she would dream about something else to depict. Maybe? Anything to fill the gaping void that opened once Sora wasn’t monopolizing her attention anymore.

“When was the last time you were able to reach him?” Marluxia asked. His voice was deceptively soft. He was probing her for information and she was none the wiser.

“It’s been a while,” Namine replied. It was hard not to whisper. She didn’t want to believe what her instincts told her. She didn’t want to believe that Sora was dead and gone from this world forever. Not him. “I don’t know exactly how long ago. The last memories I edited—”

Were before Larxene was killed. When Sora had forgiven her for ruining everything he knew about himself and everyone else.

Even when she’d been recaptured later, she wanted to believe that Sora would help her escape this castle. Maybe live somewhere where she wasn’t just a means to an end.

Maybe a place where she and Sora could have been friends. Real friends.

The second that connection was shattered, Namine was truly alone for the first time in her nonexistence. She wasn’t going to be able to fix what she had broken. She wasn’t going to be able to right the heinous wrongs she was responsible for.

“The last memories were related to someone we don’t know,” she continued finally after a long silence. “It was when Larxene tried to hurt me. But I didn’t do anything wrong!”

That was a lie. She wanted to believe it so badly, but it was a lie and both she and Marluxia knew it. Marluxia's tension was subtle. Namine’s tampering was what got Sora worked up in the first place. A gross underestimation of the child’s raw and untrained power.

This was as good a place to start as any.

“You promised him that you would fix his memories if he defeated me,” Marluxia replied. Namine didn’t know what she was supposed to say. Her entire body was tightly winding around a knot of terror. “You can still do that.”

“What?” Namine trembled more. That couldn’t be true.

“He was taken by a force neither of us understands,” Marluxia said. “A magic tied to Castle Oblivion that is far more powerful than I think anybody realizes. He is not dead. I didn’t kill him.”

The wave of relief that washed over Namine’s soul filled the room with color. Her drawings came to life before her very eyes and she welled with what she could only assume was a memory of happiness. Not her memory, but she didn’t care.

Maybe she could fix what she had done after all.

“I think you will be able to find him.”

“M-Me?” Namine stammered. “I-I don’t know where he is. I can’t track him down or change anything else.”

“I’m not asking you to.”

Marluxia blinked slowly, lips turned into a tight scowl, but he did not look Namine in the eye. He was playing her like a fiddle and she was complying so easily, he almost felt bad for her naiveté. What thrill was there in easy prey like this?

“I want to get out of this.” Marluxia sighed gently. “I don’t want to do this any longer and Sora was the only one who could have changed that. He could have freed you. He could have freed me. And then we would have never had to see each other again.”

Namine looked Marluxia up and down. She’d overheard his conversations with Larxene before. Even conversations with Axel before Axel ran away. Marluxia wanted to overthrow Xemnas, to take his place.

He wouldn’t have changed his mind. But what would she have been able to do? She’d been his pawn for so long, the idea of him seeking that same freedom she craved felt like the last thing that could have possibly been true. Sora had forgiven her even though he was furious with her.

Could Sora have forgiven Marluxia as well? He was that type of person. That’s why she had complied for so long. She wanted that warmth and light too. She wanted that freedom; that friendship.

“Why didn’t you?” she asked hesitantly. She hadn’t been paying attention, but Marluxia was much closer to her now. He was an animal getting closer to a kill. “Why didn’t you kill him? Isn’t that what you wanted?”

Marluxia’s eyes glinted malevolently, but he moved closer to Namine in an elegant and submissive fashion, kneeling on the floor with the same look of hopelessness that had flashed before him when he - for half a moment - thought he would die fighting Sora. The memory was fresh, and he latched onto it, the lifeline to complete control over the only pawn he still had.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I was so drenched in the void of darkness, that I didn’t think there was any other alternative for me. What could I do? If I didn’t comply, there was only death waiting for me. Much like there was only death for you if you didn’t either. At least, that’s what it was before. Sora was going to help me change that. But he disappeared before I could do anything.

“I firmly believe you could find him. He’s alive, I know it. But you can leave if you want. I have no power to keep you anymore. Only Xemnas has that power now. He’s the one responsible for all of this. But he doesn’t know that you’re still here.”

“You’re lying!” Namine screamed. “You wouldn’t just let me leave. You evil—”

What could she call him? A monster? A manipulative monster? What did that make her? She had done something worse. Manipulated Sora and Replica Riku. She’d lied to them, made them forget their most cherished memories, and destroyed what made them who they were. Forced an empty shell to believe he was real and then destroyed that aspect of him too.

It really took one to know one, didn’t it?

“You kept me here! And you used me!”

Marluxia squeezed his eyes shut. He couldn’t say anything to her just yet. She needed to wear herself out. Come to her own conclusions. Marluxia had already planted the seeds and Namine was playing into exactly what he needed from her. He hadn’t been lying. He didn’t have the power to keep her in the castle anymore.

Only because exerting that energy would have alerted Xemnas.

Though he had yet to test the limitations of the power restriction he had now that he’d been stripped of his title. The lack of response from the castle itself made it seem like he was scurrying around in a trap and there was only one way out of it. He was looking it right in the eye and lying through his teeth to curry favor without magical bonds.

“You wouldn’t just let me leave…”

“The door is open,” Marluxia replied. “I can’t stop you.”

“You wouldn’t.”

“If you believe that, then stay.”

Namine skirted around Marluxia and made her way to the door, smoothing her white dress in a vain attempt to appear unafraid. She would leave. If she could really leave, then that’s exactly what she was going to do. She’d leave and then she would go find Sora? Figure out a different purpose for herself?

Where would she go?

She pushed that out of her mind and didn’t look back as she wandered her way through Castle Oblivion’s halls, hoping to find the front entrance before Marluxia changed his mind.

As soon as the door closed behind Namine, Marluxia got to his feet, stretching and popping his joints. There was a small smile and Xigbar stepped out of the shadows.

“I knew you were watching me,” Marluxia said.

“I would arguably say that that was the second scariest thing I’ve ever seen, Peaches,” Xigbar replied. “I’m genuinely impressed at how treacherous you are.”

“You don’t actually mean that, do you? Surely you would have seen that coming.” That small smile grew wider, but then he frowned, erasing that ethereal beauty and morphing it into sociopathic contemplation. “Before you ask, I’m following a lead.”

“Interesting. Care to elaborate?” Xigbar asked, knowing the answer already.

“Not particularly.” Of course. “I don’t think you’ve earned it yet.”

“Me?” Xigbar chuckled and motioned to himself, his gestures exaggerated. “How could you not trust this face?”

“Oh, I think you know why.”

Xigbar shrugged and made a gun with one hand, pointing it at his own temple. “You’re still hung up on that? Geez, Peaches, I thought you would have moved on by now. Looks like you’re a grudge holder. Begrudged Apricot?”

Marluxia glared at him and he held his hands up in surrender.

“Alright, alright,” Xigbar lamented. “I get it. Look, I wasn’t going to kill you. Even if Xemnas had made that express order. You’re already aware that we can feel. Perhaps you’re a little late on the uptake.”

A slightly raised eyebrow, skeptical. Goodness, tough crowd. If Xigbar had had the freedom to be heavy handed, he might have even commented on it. But orders were orders and Marluxia wasn’t in the clear just yet.

His heart was blackening, though. Marluxia was a wily one, clever, and could beat around the bush for so long, a forest would grow and nobody would notice. He was captivating and his words felt like a song.

He was a spider.

Xigbar knew this. He knew this and he didn’t want to think that Marluxia really had fallen out of his control. Every time Xigbar pressed him, that pink asshole would slip further and further away. Out of reach. Beyond reasoning.

His had to collect himself. Reign in the naughty neophyte before he found a blade in his throat. If he was swift enough, he’d be able to pull the sharper teeth out. If he was careful enough, he wouldn’t have to.

The sinking suspicion that there were shrubs around him blanketed Xigbar. He was losing focus.

“Are you going to fight me every step of the way?” Xigbar asked. He was smiling, his words teasing. “I just want to know now so I can prepare a proper punishment.”

“Flirting again.”

“Can’t help it, Peaches. I told you already that I’m smitten.”

Marluxia scanned Xigbar closely. A new game. One meant to pick at whatever fledgling emotions were coming back to him. Xigbar was walking a razor’s edge to meet Marluxia on his isolated sandbar amidst a sea of doubt. How noble of him.

Xigbar’s chest tightened, frustration mounted just under the skin. Why couldn’t Marluxia just be obedient? He had no idea what was waiting for him. Xemnas was not merciful to traitors. And he hated that Marluxia wouldn’t back down from his own misguided convictions.

_Stupid man. Stupid stupid man._

“So?” Xigbar pressed. “Fighting me every step of the way or do I get to hold your hand as we walk into oblivion?”

Marluxia snorted. “I’m thinking about. I don’t trust you.”

That was a bold statement to make considering Xigbar had yet to exploit that one vulnerability he had. As far as Marluxia knew, Xigbar hadn’t really told anybody about their conversation previously. At least not all of it. That was the truth. Xigbar told different people different things on a need to know basis.

Marluxia wasn’t a blithering idiot though. He was on par with Xemnas’s craftiness easily and only lacked the leverage to get what he wanted. Had he had the resources, Marluxia was probably a bigger threat than Xemnas.

Marluxia also knew Xigbar suspected him of being a traitor and had not shared his opinion. If he had, Xemnas likely would not have doubted him. Saix’s response to him stemmed from Sora’s disappearance, not his accusations of Axel’s betrayal. It was slowly knitting itself together.

This made Xigbar an uneasy ally. But also an uneasy enemy.

“That’s the smartest thing you’ve said so far,” Xigbar replied. “I’ve taught you well.”

“Is that a compliment or a concern?”

Xigbar shrugged. “Maybe a bit of both.”

Marluxia narrowed his eyes. “You showed up to kill me—”

“Not kill, Peaches.”

“You showed up to wring information out of me when I was wounded. You lied to Xemnas about what you suspected of me. You coddled up to me in my single moment of weakness, and you are exploiting that now. Why should I trust you when we’re not remotely on the same page?”

This was his opportunity. Xigbar’s chest tightened again and he looked directly into Marluxia’s eyes.

“I don’t want Xemnas to kill you,” Xigbar breathed. “He wants you dead because as far as he knows, you killed a warrior of light and he doesn’t like that you’re still walking around. Just like you, he’s steeped in paranoia, and the only one who is keeping him at bay is me. You and I both know that if I told him exactly what you told me, I would be here to kill you right now.

“And you would be _dead_ , Peaches. Left in this special prison just for you.”

Marluxia’s breath caught in his throat.

“Strange things happen when husks can feel,” Xigbar continued. “I don’t like it any more than you do. But you’re in a peculiar place. Wisps of feelings. Real emotions you don’t understand. It’s just like puberty. You’re becoming a man now. Congratulations.”

Marluxia had to resist rolling his eyes. Xigbar couldn’t be serious even if his life depended on it. He did relax a little bit, though, and Xigbar felt his hands winding back around Marluxia’s throat. That control was coming back.

Good.

“The last time I did this, Vexen died unnecessarily. Who would you be willing to sacrifice?”

That caught Xigbar off guard. Right, Axel killed Vexen to gain trust.

“I don’t think that’s applicable here,” Xigbar said. “I’m not your enemy. I’m the closest thing you have to an ally. Take it or leave it.”

Marluxia hummed in thought. He really didn’t have much of a choice until he could cross paths with Zexion and Lexaeus on the basement floors. Perhaps he had more than one shaky ally and one pawn in this shitstorm.

If Xigbar betrayed him, Marluxia was still heartless enough to murder him without remorse. (Though would he have felt remorse if he was alive?)

“We’ll see,” Marluxia replied. “For now, let’s get on the same page, shall we? Namine. She’s the one who will be able to find Sora. The surest way.”

Xigbar hesitantly uncoiled his buried fear. He made a tiny step in the right direction, but that wasn’t going to be enough. The soles of his feet were bleeding and he was just going to have to deal with it until he could tie Marluxia down and keep him from running wild.

Easy peasy…

 

\---

 

When Namine had pushed the doors to Castle Oblivion open, hot tears were rolling down her cheeks. The taste of freedom was so sweet on her tongue, that she could fly away and she would be the closest thing to happy that she could be.

Marluxia had not followed her. There were no claws digging into her and dragging her back. No fabricated Heartless, no Dusks keeping her occupied. No tyrants and no more abuse. She had the freedom she wanted. It was looking at her, delightful fields of emerald green grass and clear blue skies.

She could have that and it was overwhelming in a way she couldn’t accurately describe.

_Freedom._

Why did she feel so heavy? Why did she feel like she still couldn’t step out of her immaculate cage just yet? Why wouldn’t her wings sprout and carry her away from this hell?

Namine was grounded. Sora had sacrificed everything to help her, and she was standing in the wake of freedom without even trying to return the favor. How selfish. She really was no different than Larxene and Marluxia. A monster. A horrible, selfish monster.

She covered her face, shaking and sinking to the floor as she cried. She didn’t want to be a monster. She didn’t want to be alone, hated, hunted. She wanted to have friends. Real friends. Friends who would forgive her for being so wretched even though it wasn’t her fault.

“Who are you?”

Namine jumped to her feet, startled and gasping. She whipped around, halfway expecting Marluxia to be standing there even though he wouldn’t have spoken to her like that. Instead, she came face to face with a man not much older than her by his appearance.

“I..”

The man staring her down was Zexion. His only exposed eye was a bright aqua and was narrowed suspiciously. He hadn’t sensed this intruder before. Even now, there was no scent he could place, and this was the first time he had ever seen her.

“I will not ask you again,” he said, voice low and threatening. “Who are you?”

“Namine.”

Namine? Ah, the toy Xemnas gave to Marluxia to play Lord of the Castle with. So this was what she looked like. “What are you doing here?”

“I don’t know anymore.”

Zexion brushed some of his hair out of his face. Since the beginning of this little mission of theirs, a lot of things were happening and very few of them made sense when he tried to put the pieces together. His steely blue hair was getting grayer by the hour.

He’d learned of Marluxia’s betrayal and Axel had confirmed it, but he hadn’t anticipated Vexen’s murder. And now that Axel had fled the Organization, the suspicion that Marluxia intended to destroy them all was waning. Because of all the conflict, Lexaeus had barely been able to survive his run in with Riku - the real Riku – that damn thorn.

And Larxene was dead as well.

This was all too much. All at once, the tower was crumbling and there didn’t seem to be a sufficient answer to account for all the damage. This castle was full of traitors…and Zexion frowned as the realization sank in.

He would address that later.

He’d been investigating his own leads while dealing with Riku in the basement levels. However, when someone other than Marluxia or Xigbar had pushed the castle doors open, he had to find out who it was.

Up until this point, he’d thought that it was just the Organization, Sora, and Riku roaming the halls. He’d known of Namine; heard of her, but he had never actually seen her in person. She was different. Out of place.

“Are you the one responsible for turning the Riku Replica against us?” He asked.

Namine didn’t really understand what that meant to this stranger, but she was the only one who had tampered with him. “Yes, but I didn’t do that on purpose.”

“Do you work for Marluxia?” Zexion pressed further. What was going on?

“He enslaved me,” Namine replied. Her once tear stained face scrunched in anger. “He trapped me, humiliated me, forced me to do what I did. I don’t work for him. Not anymore.”

Shameful girl.

Zexion blinked but did not relax. He stood defensively, ready to cast magic at a moment’s notice. This wasn’t adding up. Marluxia had a girl who could tamper with Vexen’s creations? What else was she responsible for? Was she the reason Sora was missing and Xemnas was in a heightened state of apathy?

“He told me I could leave,” she said, gaining a little more confidence. “All of this is Xemnas’s doing. He would have destroyed Marluxia if he hadn’t done what he did. I don’t have to stay here anymore and I don’t know who you are, but you are not going to stop me.”

Zexion’s disbelief was masked under his steely gaze. Xemnas? They had been sent here to deal with Sora and Riku. Xemnas wouldn’t have let a traitor come here and be in charge. But if everyone in the castle was a traitor so far, and Xemnas was already having them exterminated…

Oh no.

“I have no intention of stopping you,” Zexion said, turning around. “You aren’t important anymore. Marluxia wouldn’t have let you leave if you were still of use to him. Looks like you didn’t learn a thing while under his control.”

Namine frowned as Zexion disappeared. He was right, but she didn’t have to like it or even accept it. She found herself at a crossroads. Marluxia did let her go, but she didn’t think it was because she was useless to him. To the contrary.

Namine may not have had a connection to Sora anymore, but she knew Sora better than anyone else in this castle. Better then Replica Riku, better than the real Riku. Better than anybody. She dissected every link in his past and rearranged it – something that took exceptional skill and patience.

She couldn’t just let that all go to waste. She couldn’t hoist that burden onto her shoulders. Sora promised that they could maybe be friends. And friends were supposed to help each other, weren’t they?

Namine struggled to tear away from the open door. Those fields whispered to her, begged her to leave. Tears were stinging the back of her eyes and she growled through clenched teeth as she shoved the castle doors shut while she was still inside.

The doors swung heavily and creaked with effort, but they closed and locked. Namine had willingly returned to her cage, but not without a plan in mind. She would use her power to fix the people she had broken. She would find Sora. And Riku. And even Replica Riku. And apologize for being so cruel.

Maybe even make some real friends when all of this was finished.

She would do that. Of her own volition. She just had no idea how she would do it or where she would even start.

She figured that the first thing she would have to do was go find Marluxia again and ask him a few very important questions about their final fight. It made sense to her. That was the last time she had felt Sora’s memories in her grasp.

Perhaps there was some merit to retracing his steps. Especially if Sora did intend on helping those who were trapped here. Again, it wasn’t outside of his character. He was a sweet boy and was far too forgiving for his own good. That was what made him special.

All Namine had to do now was find him. The rest could be figured out along the way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It takes me 1100 years to finish anything ever, but I find that I'm enjoying myself nevertheless. I also can't seem to just write one smut and leave it at that. I have to flesh out a whole story instead. Such is life I suppose. See you next update.


	3. How Deep It Goes

Zexion made his way back down into the deepest depths of Castle Oblivion, his mind’s inner workings trying to align all the information he had at his disposal. Namine was released from Marluxia’s supervision of his own accord? That didn’t sit right with him, and he couldn’t stop his speculation from running rampant. It pained him to know he was still so susceptible to this putrid way of thinking. No logic behind it. Just primal fear.

Marluxia never did anything on accident, especially nothing like this. Namine was one of the most powerful tools he had in his arsenal. To just let her go so easily. So easily that she could walk out of the front doors? Seemed too suspicious to ignore.

It didn’t help that it looked like Xemnas was using this place as a means of thinning the herd so to speak. The stress made his mouth taste and feel like sandpaper. What was this visceral reaction? He didn’t like it one bit, though he licked his lips slightly in a vain attempt to coax the dryness to back off for a little while. A foolish and futile notion.

When Zexion arrived in the lowermost medical wing in the basement levels, he was greeted at first by silence. The quiet whirring of the monitoring equipment only became obvious the longer he stood in the doorway. A majority of the observation tanks and examination tables were shoved to the sides of the room, having been decommissioned as soon as Vexen’s scent had disappeared into the walls of the castle.

Zexion sniffed experimentally. Maybe if he did so, things would change, but alas, only the ghost of Lexaeus’s scent remained. Which was better than nothing, he supposed, better than death or whatever actually awaited a Nobody once the husk was destroyed.

When the medical wing door shut, it was concealed into the vast white of the wall with no indication that there had been a door there previously. It was easier to pretend that something wasn’t there when it could mask itself without issue. Zexion’s breath caught in his throat, perhaps as a physical gesture of apprehension.

The monolithic body on the only properly set up examination table did not move, not even to draw breath. Lexaeus, the silent but honed warrior who fell to Riku - the real Riku - just after Marluxia had defeated Sora. Mere days ago, a week at the most. Suddenly, the entire operation was turned on its head. Zexion was the only sane one left in the lower levels. The only one left to deal with Riku. Both of them. Stress crept up on him in the form of tight fists struggling to remain still, and shallow harrowed breaths.

“You’re just as bad as Peaches, you know.”

Zexion’s senses were overwhelmed with the smell of Xigbar’s suffocating darkness. Not a whiff of the other and suddenly he was all encompassing. Zexion almost instantly spun around in flight, content to abandon that facade of sensibility to give in - finally - to the desire to preserve himself at all costs.

But that would have been in bad form.

“If I had any idea what you were talking about, I’d be inclined to comment,” Zexion replied, voice steady, eyes focused on Lexaeus’s body. “I take it you are here for something?”

Xigbar melted into existence from the shadows. Zexion was unsure how Xigbar managed such a feat, but he knew better than to inquire, lest he poke the sniper with the deadly aim. Already, this was going to prove challenging.

“I’m just here wondering why you’re all dropping like flies is all.”

Zexion’s inner workings coiled in disgust. Xigbar wouldn’t even attempt to lie to him? After all this time? Zexion felt almost betrayed. But Xigbar was just like this more often than not. At least he wasn’t dangerous for now.

“I thought it would be obvious,” Zexion said. “We were woefully underprepared for what we were dealing with and we are dying as a direct result of that. It didn’t have to be this way, but things happen so they say.”

“How poetic,” Xigbar said with a soft chuckle. “A real tearjerker if I ever heard one.”

“What do you want, Xigbar?”

“I already said what I was here for,” Xigbar said quickly.

“And I answered your concerns,” Zexion replied just as fast. “Unless you’re going to suddenly reanimate the dead, there is not much of interest here for you. Why not go play with Marluxia on the upper floors? You like your toys feisty, so I hear.”

Xigbar raised his arms in alarm. “Whoa, who told you that?”

Zexion blinked slowly. “I have a nose and eyes. You reek.”

Xigbar mockingly sniffed under his arm. “I cleaned up, though. Hey, man, I have a physical body, gimme a break.”

Another slow and unamused blink from Zexion sobered Xigbar up. Zexion never liked to have fun. So much for being a kid when he died. Ah, yes, ever the sullen one. He hadn’t meant to step on toes, but here they were, stepping on each other’s toes in a perverted dance of vagueness.

“I have to tend to Lexaeus,” Zexion finally said. “Get to the point, Xigbar. You certainly must be busy with all the running around you have to do lately.”

“Lunch break. Nobody’s gotta eat too.” Xigbar lowered his arms. “I’m just supposed to be piecing things together. None of my colleagues seem to like helping me out with my job...And you had the nerve to chastise me before.”

Zexion took a deep breath. “What do you want to know?”

“Marluxia and company spent an awful lot of time dealing with Sora and his friends. Rather successfully all things considered. Except, there’s something off about some of those tools, don’t you think?”

“I’m not following.”

Xigbar came closer and draped an arm around Zexion’s shoulders. “Ah, what was that one thing called? Huh? Riku, right?” He paused for effect and Zexion froze over.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Zexion removed Xigbar’s arm. “If you recall in our last conversation, I also chastised you for eavesdropping, did I not? My opinion hasn’t changed. And I still focus on my own duties. So nosy.”

“It’s my major character flaw so I’m told.” Xigbar chuckled again, though when Zexion did not respond, he fell into silence. When he spoke again, his tone changed drastically. “It’s not the real Riku, you know. Just putting it out there.”

Zexion remained silent.

Xigbar sighed and shrugged in defeat. “I take it back. You’re worse than Peaches. Fine, I’ll just go and do my reporting duties. Zexion is noncompliant. Sorry, Bossman.”

Terror gripped him, hooking long claws into his flesh and pulling at him. Zexion tensed visibly, though Xigbar had looked away when he shrugged. Zexion spiralled into a rabbit hole of speculation. It flashed across his eyes and was over almost instantly.

“Your real character flaw is your lack of patience,” Zexion breathed. “How can you label me noncompliant when you know that’s false?”

“Easy peasy. I write it in a report. Now you don’t know how reporting works? Odd.”

“It was never my business.”

“And now your closest colleagues are dead. Well, one is. With another on the way.” Xigbar’s pressure was stifling.

Zexion grimaced. He’d been ignoring Xigbar’s suffocating scent to the best of his ability, but now things were different. Xigbar was the mole looking for intel and he likely already had a finger on the trigger. As of now, Zexion couldn’t tell how itchy it was, but if his intuition was anything to go by, Xigbar was close to scratching.

“I never intended to share that information,” Zexion said. “I am no traitor.”

“Never said you were,” Xigbar replied solemnly. “Hey, don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me. I don’t care about your secrets anyway. Just doing my job after all. Boring as sin, but you know how it is. Something something Kingdom Hearts. Nothing is supposed to get in the way of that.”

Zexion swallowed, struggling with keeping it subtle. If Xigbar had seen that struggle, he was merciful enough not to mention it. At least for now.

“Axel’s gone rogue, they say,” Xigbar muttered. “He’s not as literal as Marluxia, but he’s been trained. Might want to watch your back. Riku’s not the only one gunning for it.”

A sudden and very unwelcome queasiness enveloped Zexion as Xigbar melted away. The overwhelming scent of putridity vanished and Zexion, for the first time in a while, took a long and defeated sounding breath. He’d been afraid.

He still was.

When he was certain that he was alone once more, Zexion eased into a chair next to Lexaeus, his eyes focused on the other. There was little consolation in the fact that Lexaeus’s scent was just a little bit stronger than before.

“You don’t know what you’ll be getting yourself into,” Zexion murmured as quietly as he could. He leaned forward until he was almost completely folded, hands tight in his lap. “You’re better off not coming back.”

No reply.

Zexion’s nose itched. He did not detect anything near. No Xigbar, no Marluxia. No Riku. And no Axel. For that, he uneasily wheezed a silent apology and tenderly took Lexaeus’s limp hand. He steeled himself, though his fingers twitched with worry.

“My friend,” he muttered, squeezing gently. “Understand the severity of our situation.”

He fell silent, grasping at the limp hand in his own as he tried to stave off the inevitable. The fear was still wrapped around him in a dangerous cloud, choking him, though he’d rather die again than admit it or show any difference in his half lidding stare.

Then, ever so quietly, he whispered to Lexaeus, “I don’t want Axel to kill me.”

No response.

 

\---

 

The halls of Castle Oblivion were far less familiar once Namine found herself searching through the place looking for someone else. Her chest was tight, and she spent several hours drifting from crying, to anger, to panic. How could she be doing this now? How could she even consider looking for _him_?

Her abuser. Her tormentor. How could she betray herself so thoroughly?

But the truth, she rationalized, was that she needed Marluxia in order to find Sora and fix him. She hadn’t been trying to fabricate facts when she said she couldn’t reach Sora’s heart. His warmth had filled her and it had vanished instantly upon his defeat. His presence had vacated her husk of a body like a cold wind, inviting all the horrors of emptiness.

She wanted to get Sora back. To fulfil the promise that she would fix all the things she had broken. To maybe be his friend for real after everything was put back in its place. She wanted to do that because it was the right thing to do. Right?

Marluxia would be able to guide her. No matter how much she hated it - hated him - she could recognize that he did have a way with words. Concentration. Exploration. If anyone was capable of redirecting her now directionless energy, it was him.

The putrid taste of bile rose in her throat. Could he really be different? Changed? Marluxia had defeated Sora in combat. Namine had no idea how he had managed that, but there was no time to waste on speculation. She could protect herself. Somehow.

Maybe then she could use her magic differently. Yeah, that was something she could do. Be strong on her own so _she_ could help Sora.

“Namine?”

Namine whipped around. She had flinched, much to her own chagrin. (She was supposed to be strong now, wasn’t she?) She’d been expecting to be attacked, but to her surprise, she was still in one piece, despite coming face to face with Replica Riku.

“Riku!” she cried instinctively.

She had wanted to hold him. Hug him tightly because he was a familiar face in such a chaotic and abrasive world that she had willingly walked back into. He was a weight off her chest, a breath of fresh air. And she was swept away by him.

His body was warm despite being just as empty as hers. She hugged him back, tears welling into her eyes. Her throat closed and she tried not openly weep in Riku’s arms. She hadn’t realized how alone she felt until now.

“I’m sorry,” Replica Riku said. “For everything. I--”

Namine squeezed him even tighter. “No. You did fine. I’m the one who is sorry. I should have never lied to you. I should have been the bigger person. I should have...I should have been...”

She wept, but Replica Riku did not let her go. She hated everything about herself. She was such a monster and even though she had done so much harm to everybody she would have considered a friend, she desperately clung to the idea that maybe - maybe - she could be forgiven for her sins.

“I’m so glad I was able to find you,” Replica Riku whispered. “I was afraid that you were gone. Or worse.” He paused and let Namine go. “Sora. Where is he? I can’t find him.”

Namine sniffled and wiped her eyes. “I don’t know. He disappeared when Marluxia defeated him.”

Replica Riku stiffened. “Marluxia? He _beat_ Sora?”

“And I’m the only one who has a chance at finding him!” Namine shook violently. “I don’t know what to do!”

“Do you need help?”

Was it wrong to need help? Namine paused. She was supposed to be finding Sora. This was her new purpose. A purpose she chose for herself that she had the utmost confidence in. Almost the utmost confidence. It pained her. But she would rather Replica Riku’s help than Marluxia’s. Perhaps his protection from Marluxia’s wily ways?

_You’re manipulating him._

She shook her head. She wasn’t manipulating. She was accepting Replica Riku’s offer to help her. She was choosing to let him do that. She didn’t need it. She didn’t!

“If you want to help me after everything I’ve done to you,” her voice faltered. “I would be honored to accept. But don’t pity me. I’m not a good person. I need to make it up to you more than anyone else.”

Replica Riku hadn’t been expecting that and almost immediately, he felt conflicting feelings well inside him. He’d thought he’d left those intrusive thoughts behind when Sora had given a speech about friendship and redemption. Apparently not.

It was true. Namine _had_ manipulated him. Forced him into believing he was somebody that he wasn’t to fight for her honor in order to beat Sora using darkness. She had installed - goodness he hated thinking about it like that - false memories to use him. To turn him into a weapon. And when she had undone all of it, he was broken. Perhaps that was the most human thing about him despite him being a construct at best.

He’d said he’d forgiven her. He’d said a lot of things he didn’t really remember, but now all those spiteful feelings were resurfacing. Again, the most human thing about him. He swallowed those feelings of rage and betrayal. He wasn’t sure who to blame, but lashing out had gotten him into a lot of unnecessary fights. This was one he didn’t want to indulge, if nothing else.

“I’m still dealing with it,” Replica Riku said. “I still haven’t decided if I should keep my fake name. I still haven’t decided a lot of things. But...I want to help you. I think if I do, I’ll figure out a lot more than if I was on my own. Or went hunting for the real Riku.”

His spite was palpable and encumbered with a particularly sharp layer of bramble that almost made Namine flee. She couldn’t leave him, though. She’d made him this way. The least she could do was support him.

“You’re real too, you know,” she said softly. “You might not be him, but you’re still here and you’re still your own person. If a little young. I’m sorry, Riku.”

Replica Riku remained quiet for an unsettlingly long time. Namine’s face fell, expecting this response, but underestimating how she would feel about it. She didn’t really deserve an answer and she shouldn’t even feel entitled to one in the first place. Though, for just a moment, she wished Replica Riku would just answer her. Even if it was with hate and malice. At least she wouldn’t be in the dark.

“I think I’d rather be called Repliku,” he said finally. “I’m not Riku. I’m a copy of him. That should be part of how I identify myself, I think. It’s a part of who I am.”

Namine realized suddenly that he was talking more to himself. She felt like a voyeur, watching him as he struggled with who and what he was and how he planned to work with it. She almost averted her eyes to give him privacy despite being so close to him.

“If that’s what makes you happy,” Namine replied.

“It’s a start. Maybe…” More uncomfortable silence. “What are you going to do now?”

“Oh, I was, uh, I was going to try and find Sora. Or bring him back from wherever he is.”

Repliku nodded. “Do you think he’s in the Realm of Darkness?”

“I don’t know. I don’t think so, though.” Namine stared longingly down the hall. The frame of the doorway seemed so obtuse and offensive to her senses. Something was wrong with it in a way she could not really comprehend for now. “Something the Castle itself did, I’d say. This place does have an odd magic at work here. I don’t know what it is exactly, but to be quite honest, I don’t know a whole lot to begin with. I’m just as lost as you are.”

Repliku grimaced. “Tell me you have some sort of plan at least.”

She flushed with embarrassment. “I was going to see if I couldn’t get Marluxia to help me.”

“Help you!?” There was the rage. Unfiltered and flaring like a many-armed demon emerging from a womb of intolerance. “Why would you even entertain that idea? Didn’t he trap you? Didn’t he use you? _Didn’t he hurt Sora?_ ”

Every instinct told her to shield herself from Repliku. Maybe run. Try to hide from his stifling aura of anger. But she managed, half-heartedly, to keep her arms down. This anger was justified. This anger was needed. It was rational.

“As much as I hate to admit it, Marluxia knows this place better than I do. He might have trapped me, but he has access to information that I don’t. He claims Sora was going to help him get free of the one doing this--”

“And you believe him?”

“Even if it’s a lie, that doesn’t stop him from having information that I don’t,” Namine shot back. “Even if his goal is to get Sora back, the point is that Sora is back. We could get him to safety after we get him from whatever place he’s been moved to.”

“You can understand why I’m not exactly excited to go back to the person responsible for this mess in the first place, right? I don’t have to spell it out, do I?” Repliku snorted and folded his arms. “I’m not exactly eager to be a pawn again. You shouldn’t be either. At least give it some thought before you go rushing off.”

Namine had to catch herself before she burst into tears. “I want to do something. Not sit around and think too hard about it. I did that while I was looking freedom in the face. I chose to close the doors to the castle and stay here until Sora was safe. I chose that of my own accord and even if you won’t come with me, I’m going to fix what I broke. Even if it kills me! It wouldn’t even matter anyway! I DESERVE IT!”

Repliku flinched as Namine yelled at him. She clamped her hands over her mouth immediately and didn’t bother trying to fight the tears anymore. So that’s what this was about. She deserved to suffer for her actions. Shame and foolishness washed over her, soaking her to her bones.

Repliku didn’t know what to say. He tried, oh he did try, but his mouth just opened and closed without anything coming out of it. He wanted to say that she didn’t deserve to die, but he knew that his budding feelings were quite the contrary. He did, thankfully, know better than to affirm that or express it in any way.

He looked down at the floor pointly, his fingers curled into fists. The shadowy nagging of his weapon pulled at the corners of his mind and the urge to just destroy poked him dangerously. He could break at any moment and it likely wouldn’t matter unless he allowed it to. He wanted Sora back as well, though his internal methods were a bit more violent and straightforward.

“Fine,” he said through grit teeth. “But I am going with you and if he makes any sudden moves. Marluxia.” A deep breath to reorganize. “If Marluxia does anything to hurt you again, I’m going to kill him.”

Namine wiped her eyes. “Thank you…”

Repliku took another deep and controlled breath through his nostrils. “Where is he?”

 

\---

 

_Where is it?_

Marluxia finally found himself deep in the basement levels, meticulously searching for the space Vexen used for research. He was so certain that it was there - somewhere - that he could feel himself slipping into the closest approximation to madness that he was capable of.

He’d crossed paths with Riku once. He’d managed to pass himself off as a different member for mere moments before he was faced with an altercation. He disappeared quickly, though, for he did not have the time to deal with another insufferable brat who had little recollection of who he really was.

Marluxia had had enough of that with Sora. He couldn’t afford to get distracted. Zexion and whatever was left of Lexaeus would have to take care of Riku going forward. Above all, he had to stay focused on finding Vexen’s workspace before Xigbar did.

Xigbar wouldn’t be tailing him so closely if he really had stolen all that information and put it back in Xemnas’s jurisdiction. Marluxia was certain of it. Xigbar was a prickly and often lazy man, but Marluxia had always known how to read him. Xigbar would have been out in the open a hell of a lot more often if he really had everything under control. Xigbar would be taunting and teasing.

And they’d be fucking as a distraction.

Marluxia shook his head clear. He was getting too into his own head again and he didn’t have the stamina to spiral out of control. That could happen later. Much later.

There were eyes on him. He could feel them boring into the back of his head and digging deep into his psyche. Xigbar? No, it couldn’t be. Xigbar would have said something by now.

_Come on, Peaches. All the way down here?_ What a prick.

“Axel’s gone rogue…”

Marluxia spun around, cloak billowing around him as he reached into the in-between for his weapon, though he did not summon it just yet. Familiar voice. It was always a familiar voice, wasn’t it?

Axel appeared in the doorway. He didn’t seem threatening, at least, not initially. Marluxia blinked slowly, though feigned surprise as he met Axel’s polarized gaze. A worthy opponent lurked within the walls after all. It was better than nothing.

“Oh,” he mused. It almost felt like an afterthought. “Interesting.”

“That’s what Saix told you, wasn’t it?” Axel’s smirk twisted into a wide smile. “No surprises there, huh?”

Marluxia started. “Honestly, I was expecting Xigbar.”

“Right. Your boyfriend.”

“I suppose,” Marluxia replied with a lazy shrug. “He’d be able to kill me faster than you could. That’s an attractive quality since I’m still being honest.”

“Oh, spare me,” Axel said, cutting Marluxia off. “Saix was only partially right, you know. I’ve gone rogue, but I wanted to drop by and see if you’d be willing to openly betray Xemnas with me. We’d make a great team.”

_You’re a terrible liar._

Marluxia shook his head. “Not interested.”

“Quick to answer. That’s too bad.” Axel sighed. “You didn’t even think about it for that long. Kind of anticlimactic, don’t you think? I was hoping for a little more flare.”

“You came here to fight me,” Marluxia said. “I figured you wanted to get straight to the point. I fail to understand what’s taking you so long.”

“I figured I’d try converting you to my cause at least once.” Axel took another deep breath. “Probably could have tried a bit harder, but you’re kind of an asshole so I’m not really pressed to stay polite.”

“How like you.”

Axel rolled his eyes. He never liked Marluxia all that much. Too prim and proper. Never really let himself go. Wouldn’t know the word relax if his life depended on it. In a manner of speaking…

He, too, reached into the space between space, probing for his weapons so he could end this confrontation. That would prove his worth, surely. Of course, he wasn’t thinking that far ahead. He only really wanted one thing, and that one thing was being blocked by a thicket of insufferable arrogance. One Xemnas was plenty. Two identically paranoid megalomaniacs would be far too many.

If there was one thing that Axel had in common with Marluxia, it was speed. They both performed similar roles within the ranks of the Organization after all - though he was higher in rank by numerals only - so when Axel evaporated in a subtle flash of embers and reappeared just behind Marluxia, it was with an element of uncertainty. Marluxia’s eyes went wide with anticipation, bordering on sadistic delight, though he did not bring Graceful Dahlia forth just yet.

This was as much a mind game as it was a physical altercation and Marluxia had every intention of coming out on top.

Axel’s weapons flared to life, absorbing the air around the two of them to fuel a chaotic and uncontrollable blaze. Marluxia ducked as the tips of Axel’s chakrams collided and sparks showered the two of them, but he did not hesitate in sweeping Axel’s feet from under him. The two of them disappeared.

And they clashed. And they clashed again. Each time they came together, there was a shower of sparks and the grating sound of metal on metal. Occasionally, flower petals would burn to ashes. Neither of the two men seemed to slow despite a number of wounds appearing over each of them.

“You are such a pain in the ass,” Axel growled as they locked their weapons together.

Marluxia remained calm, though his eyes narrowed. Xigbar’s nagging voice pulled at the corners of his mind about emotions being real. Was Axel another case of this? Was this why he acted so irrationally? That couldn’t be it. However, he did not reply, merely tightened his grip on Graceful Dahlia and arched his body so he could maintain his momentum.

Axel forced himself away, though Marluxia was one step ahead of him, blasting a wide swathe of energy from Graceful Dahlia’s blade to follow his sweep. Axel shielded himself, through his arms locked with the effort and sweat dripped from his brow.

The break between them was crackling with tension and the air bristled with heat. Axel was flooding the room with fire, and that made it hard to concentrate. Marluxia hadn’t underestimated Axel’s battling capabilities, but he was beginning to feel the effects of those flames. It was difficult for him to breathe and he was at a significant disadvantage with his more plant based magic. Any attempts to form something was easily overcome by the intensity of his opponent.

“You won’t even dignify me with a response?” Axel gripped Eternal Flames tighter. Had his knuckles been bare, they would have been white with chaotic fury. “I thought what we had was special.”

Marluxia blinked slowly, still stubbornly silent. The two of them were refined and sharpened to deadly points. To lose focus now would end in defeat and if Axel had picked up on that, it wasn’t obvious in his mannerisms. To Marluxia, Axel seemed directionless. He seemed...afraid.

Of course.

Marluxia slowly wound himself up to spring into action. A instinctual response for sure. A natural desire to remain as opportunistic as possible even now. “Contrary to popular belief, I am capable of showing mercy.”

Axel didn’t know how respond. All his anger caught in his throat and he opened his mouth like a fish struggling on dry land. Marluxia sighed deeply and once more they were locked in combat, but Marluxia had taken the opportunity to jam the handle of Graceful Dahlia right into the hollow of Axel’s throat, effectively choking him.

Instantaneously the fires sputtered out as Axel gasped for breath. He hadn’t expected a response quite to that degree of forboddingness, and the slight hiss to Marluxia’s voice scared him. Was it over? Was he going to die now?

What a shame. The least he could do was go out with a bang. A simple surprise exchange and the crushing of his windpipe was hardly the way to go. That was too subtle. That was too mundane; too calculated. Unfun.

Marluxia hadn’t dismissed Graceful Dahlia even though Axel had fallen. Like Axel, he felt it was too simple and without much pizzazz. Axel was a flashy sort when he wanted to be and a perceived near-death experience would be just the fodder necessary for an explosive finale.

Marluxia, though, had to prevent Axel from running off to report anything or head back to the Castle for any reason. That would be too dangerous if Saix was indeed plotting something under Xemnas’s nose. Axel first, Saix later.

The only sound that was shared between them was Axel’s gasping. Two assassins sharing a room together because one thing led to another. Such is life. Unlife? Marluxia vaguely recalled this feeling. Ah, yes, murder. It was a familiar action veiled in a cloudy fog.

Axel’s wheezing brought Marluxia back to the present. Right. Priorities.

“Why did you come here?” Marluxia asked, looming as he approached Axel. “It wasn’t to defeat me, surely. That display was pathetic.”

Axel remained silent.

“That’s okay, you don’t have to tell me,” he continued. “It’s not that important that I know.” There was a long pause. “You betrayed my trust, Axel. That’s an unforgivable slight against me. Larxene is dead because of you.”

Again, nothing.

“It’s probably better that you don’t say anything. Makes it easier.”

What in all the hells was that supposed to mean? Axel raised his arms and pushed himself away in a scramble. He didn’t want to die. He couldn’t die now. There was so much he had to do still. There was so much more.

How could he have forgotten what he was supposed to be doing? How could he have allowed himself to fall so far into Xemnas’s mire of influence that he would do something so foolish? In a sense, he deserved this for being an idiot, but in the same breath, he reasoned that he didn’t.

Axel wheezed again. “I guess if I have to go down, I’m taking as much of you with me as I can.”

Marluxia sucked in a sharp breath. Oh.

It started with a concentrated ball of fire in his hands. Axel had been pooling himself for unleashing every ounce of energy he could spare to burn Marluxia to a crisp and hopefully walk out of this altercation with his body intact. It was a stupid idea, and almost immediately, Axel recognized that, but it was too late for either of them to stop now. It was either die by a sadist’s hands, or die in an explosion of his own design.

The choice was obvious.

As that little ball of fire grew more and more intense, Axel, in a colossal leap of blind faith, leaped up and at Marluxia with his eyes squeezed shut and his mouth pulled into an unattractive grimace dressed in spite and spitfire. A bat out of hell.

Marluxia narrowed his eyes as flames licked his skin. He had a single second of an opening before he’d be vaporized. He focused so intently on Axel’s face that it was a wonder that Axel hadn’t stopped dead in his tracks despite his eyes being closed. Perhaps that’s why he had done that; to alleviate the searing terror that welled within him.

Embers evolved into a conflagration of otherworldly horror. Axel teased all the energy out of himself and the room around them to engulf them in a swirling column of fire. Marluxia drew up his own energy to the surface of his skin, curling vines around him to take the brunt of the heat. It wasn’t a perfect solution, but it would buy him time. That was the most important commodity in all the worlds.

His window opened. It wasn’t immediately apparent, and it was fleeting, but Marluxia could see through the fire for just a moment. He locked eyes with Axel, who betrayed his fear and desperation for mere moments. That hesitation ultimately was what did him in. Within the span of a blink of an eye, Marluxia lurched through the flames, gritting his teeth with the effort to stave off the pressure. His sleeve almost melted to his skin and he fought back the urge to cry out as his exposed skin began to char.

_Fuck. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck…_

He reached and reached until his gloved hands felt the tip of the other’s nose and then Marluxia took all his energy, redirected his momentum, and latched his hand around the bulk of Axel’s face. He felt teeth dig into the crook between his index finger and thumb, but he didn’t let go. He spun, tightened his hold and slammed Axel as hard as he could into the tiled floor. The tiles cracked and a spiderweb of microfissures spread out under Axel’s head.

Marluxia looked like a savage, blue eyes straining to keep composure. They were alive with ambition and strength. Power oozed from him and and he blinked as a splash of blood lanced across his face. Axel made a guttural sound that was laced with desperation and his eyes grew red as the capillaries burst under the intense pressure.

Flecks of tile flew in all directions and every single flame was snuffed immediately. Eternal Flames crashed into the tiles as well, the life extinguished.

“Like I said,” Marluxia spat. “Larxene is dead because of you. Entombed here because you plan poorly and execute said plans even more poorly than that. Disgusting.”

Axel was far too dazed to struggle, though the life was draining from him. Marluxia didn’t care. To get a little bit of frustration out felt nice. It was like breathing anew, though perhaps that was because the heat was dispersing and all that was left was the wisps of smoke rising from his coat.

Was it pathetic to beg? Seemed so. Axel struggled to breath through the thin film of blood coating his throat.

“I’m not going to kill you so don’t waste my time,” Marluxia continued. “I’m just going to make sure you stay put.”

As he covered Axel’s mouth more and dug into his flesh, Marluxia hooked his other hand around the zipper to Axel’s coat and unzipped it. Axel’s chest was bare, but littered with bruises and lacerations. He did not struggle against Marluxia as he worked.

There was a delicateness to the way Marluxia moved. He took great care and some sort of twisted pride in making Axel relish in this air of helplessness. It most certainly fed his ego, but there was veiled suspicion in his eyes. If Axel could really feel, then the ensuing panic of helplessness would lead to odd responses. Responses that Marluxia could monitor over time.

He rolled Axel over and removed the coat from him. And without another word to him, or to the second set of eyes he was certain were there, Marluxia left Axel on the basement floor.

 

\---

 

_Xemnas,_

 

_As per your request, I have compiled a report for your perusal. I think you will find the discoveries made to be of the utmost importance. Your guidance will be necessary in order to finish the final tasks allocated to us at the beginning of the extended stay, as Vexen has unfortunately been killed._

_The discoveries, in short, are as follows:_

_Axel has returned to Castle Oblivion. His motives are unclear, however, he is moving through the Castle slowly. He has not crossed paths with Namine or Sora. Both the real and Replica Riku have been occupied by the nature of the Castle itself and have not caused further harm. Riku seems to be depending more on the power darkness gives him to achieve his goals. Lexaeus still has not recovered from his last altercation._

_Marluxia continues to search for Sora’s remains. He has allowed Namine to roam freely between floors, though his motives, too, are unclear. He is making his way to the basement levels, which leads me to believe that Sora’s energies are buried somewhere within the basement levels. My initial assumptions lie with Riku’s energy._

_There is no way to get around the fact that the ranks within Castle Oblivion have been weakened through issurection. Axel’s actions make little sense for now, however, I will faithfully observe from a safe distance and continue reporting my experiences and discoveries._

...

How did he finish this? How was he supposed to explain how dire the situation was without it sounding like weakness - or worse? Zexion leaned over his report, pen in hand, but mind empty.

Your Organization is falling apart and you have done nothing…

That’s what he wanted to say. He wanted to ask if Castle Oblivion was just a means to killing them all based on suspicion alone. He wanted to ask why Xemnas was acting so paranoid. Perhaps this was as it was meant to be, and if so, Zexion anticipated no response of any kind. They had been in the the dark for so long, why not close the chapter on the same note?

His hands shook as he wrote the rest of his report. He was careful to choose his words. Ask questions without asking questions. It still took an inordinate amount of time considering how fluent he usually was. Suddenly, nothing made sense, and he had to deal with the consequences of actions he had no dealings with.

Xigbar breathing down his neck didn’t help. He was still weary from that, and if Xigbar was still watching him, he would know that as well.

With the report sealed and sent off, Zexion drew himself back to the steely numbness he was used to operating with. Calm, cool, collected. And most importantly: emotionless. He sat back with Lexaeus, who still hadn’t moved.

With another, more subtle form of weak grasping, Zexion held fast to Lexaeus's hand. And he began calculating. He supposed that now was as good a time as any to look for some allies before the whole world came crashing down around him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So last time, it took me 1 month to get a new chapter out. This one took 1 year. So if my calculations are correct, it should be about 10 years before the next chapter. I know I did this to myself, but you know what? Life is hard and busy.
> 
> Thanks for your patience.


	4. Where It Stands

Marluxia’s recovery was relatively short. He’d hidden himself away to lick his wounds and survey the damage done to his so clever and well constructed laundry list of assumptions. He had taken a particular fondness for what was once an elaborate throne room. It was a physical representation of something that was inherent to him. It seemed fitting that this would be the place for him to regroup and recalibrate his plan of action. Almost a little too fitting now that he thought about it more deeply.

Axel had come a lot sooner than he had really planned for, but he had been able to neuter the man in a way that would keep him occupied long enough to get everything back in order. Axel would have to either find him again, find another member and attack them, or return to Xemnas unprotected. That level of desperation could easily be measured from a distance unless Axel wanted to try his luck. The most extreme case, Marluxia reasoned, would be Axel going through a portal unprotected.

Which would be exceptionally unwise if he was growing a heart back on his own like Xigbar had hinted. It would be catastrophic and would likely be avoided at all costs. Surely a member without a heart would be far superior in skill should Axel choose to strike. Desperation and fear weren’t supposed to affect their judgment. This was an excellent self-contained distraction for Axel.

_There was no way you could have known Axel was the traitor and that he was in bed with Saix._

That was what Xigbar had said to him before. It felt like an eternity ago, though the Castle itself had a strange way of warping the world around it. Short lengths of time were drawn out to indescribable lengths. That was the beauty of this place, but that was also how it robbed you of your identity if given enough time.

“You okay?” Xigbar warped into reality, taking great care to allow Marluxia the space he needed to lash out, lest he found himself in another forest of deceit. “Took quite a turn. I was expecting him to just burn the whole place down.”

Marluxia blinked, taken aback. “Is that what you plan to do while you’re here? Let things happen?”

“Back at it again with the accusations.” Xigbar hung his head in mock shame. “You never change.”

“What do you want?”

Xigbar hummed. “Mostly to make sure you weren’t dead. I also wanted to ask if you found what you were looking for yet.”

Marluxia was silent for a painfully long time. Xigbar had almost left, thinking that he’d never get an answer. “No," he admitted with an air of disappointment. Subtle, but there.

“I told you, Peaches. I had plenty of time to move Vexen’s research back to the Castle with Xemnas. I thought you would give up looking for it by now and focus on your job.”

“Yes, well, you think a lot of things, don’t you?” Marluxia replied venomously. “And most of the time, you’re wrong.”

“What, and you aren’t?” Xigbar sighed. “You must be yanking my chain. You’re supposed to be focusing on the task at hand. Come now, do you have to mill around for this long? Your enemy isn’t here in case you forgot. Well, I guess Axel’s here, but if that last display was anything to go by, you’re not concerned about him still being alive.”

“I can be merciful.”

“You sure can.” Xigbar still kept his distance despite wanting to get closer. Now was not the best time to stick his fingers in any wounds. Now was not the time to try pulling any teeth. “What are you planning on doing now? Resisting me?”

“Only if I could get away with it,” Marluxia replied softly. There was the compliance again; Marluxia was relaxing. Xigbar’s heart skipped a couple beats. “You won’t stop pestering me until I do what you want me to. I want you out of my way.”

“Wow, when you say it like that, you make me sound like a bad guy.”

“Don’t patronize me,” Marluxia spat.

“Easy there, Peaches,” Xigbar replied, voice level. “You don’t need to posture around me. I get it, really, I do. I know I say that a lot, but you don’t really listen to the first time anybody tells you anything important. You’re too into your own head. Always have been.”

Stubborn silence.

“Mind if I join you?” Xigbar asked. “Promise I’m not being nefarious. Figured you’ve had enough of that for today. Or at least for now.” A subtle, but sly grin graced his lips.

“Fine,” Marluxia said. “If it’ll get you to stop being a pain in the ass.”

Xigbar approached Marluxia carefully, recognizing the shift in tone, but also fully aware that Marluxia was still the prickly sort. “You know I can’t make you any promises. But it’s better than sitting here like a wounded animal, right? It’s how I found you before, remember.”

Marluxia didn’t dignify that with a response. He knew he was acting cagey and perhaps a little rash all things considering. He was vulnerable again, though not nearly as much as last time. Xigbar was still a force to be reckoned with, and no matter how sweet his words or how docile he appeared, Xigbar was not an ally that could be trusted. As much as he disliked admitting it - even to himself - there was an element of fear there. Desperation.

If he could have cut it out of himself in that moment, Marluxia absolutely would have taken the opportunity to carve that space out of his body. The space that was supposedly filling with natural emotion needed to stay empty as far as he was concerned. He couldn’t focus when he was worried about being found out; when he was worried about losing his grip on his situation; when he was overwhelmed with…

Emotions.

This was what Xigbar liked best about being with Marluxia in those moments of vulnerability (no matter how fleeting). Marluxia would get frantic, delve deep into his own psyche and get lost in speculation, and Xigbar could just spectate freely without being challenged.

This was when, he noticed, Marluxia was at his most beautiful. Eyes slightly glossed over in serene contemplation masked by split seconds of chaos that swirled back into an eerie calmness. A deep blue that Xigbar could swim in for all eternity if allowed to.

He became viscerally aware that he would destroy any who would taint that purity. It gripped him and squeezed a breath out of him before he pulled himself back together. Too real of a reaction for his liking. Too violent for his personality. Senseless violence wasn’t really his style.

But he could make a great supplement to someone whose style it _was_.

“Don’t think so deeply about it, Peaches,” Xigbar said, inching a little closer. He’d plopped himself about an arm’s length away from Marluxia, who sat upon the low steps of the throne room. The chair itself was smashed to bits under a bright white column. “You’re running wild.”

“Xigbar, now is not really the time for this,” Marluxia hissed. “If all you're going to do is chastise me for sparing Axel's life, then leave.”

“Hey, now,” Xigbar sighed. “Just let me be your mentor, yeah? It’ll bring you comfort in the long run. Stop being so stubborn.”

“Those days are over,” Marluxia replied. “I’ve grown past your guidance. We are equals now.”

“Debatable.”

“Xigbar, I’m too tired to fight you.”

Xigbar took a deep breath. “I don’t want to fight you. It’s not as fun when you’re being dramatic.”

“They always want to fight me.” _They? Ah, Marluxia was thinking aloud._

“It’s because they like a challenge,” Xigbar replied seamlessly. This was rehearsed and it sounded like it.

Marluxia frowned and Xigbar nearly jumped out of his skin to backpedal. “Do they really see me as that much of a threat?” Marluxia said.

Xigbar blinked. “I guess my answer will depend on how frisky you’re feeling.”

“Are you...are you flirting with me?”

“Might be.”

Marluxia inhaled sharply, a clear and obvious attempt at stifling a chuckle. “You’re bad at it.”

“Please,” Xigbar snorted. “What more do you want from me? You already have my heart and soul. And my other soul.”

“Is that what you call it?”

Xigbar smiled. He would have winked had he the ability to, but he had to settle for a flirtatious cock of his head and the poking out of his tongue. “What more can I give you, Peaches? You already have all of me.”

Marluxia made a subtle scoff of disbelief.

“Alright, I’m bluffing. Relax, it’s not that serious.”

“You would say that, wouldn’t you?”

Xigbar shrugged. “Someone around here has to keep you on your toes. You might lose that stunning edge if I let you get dull. It takes a lot to stimulate you and you’re always begging for more. Give this old man a break, will you?”

Another sharp intake of breath. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

“What would you dream of?”

Marluxia stiffened immediately and Xigbar would have shot himself in the foot if he had the veil of secrecy. Once again, he was being careless. Too straightforward in his manipulation. Goodness, perhaps he really was an old man. Senile and foolish.

He couldn’t backpedal this time. He was going to have to own that blunder and try to spin it a bit differently. He blanched at that stilted and mistrustful look that Marluxia shot at him. Here, he thought they were being genial. Foolish old man.

“Is that your way of getting me to use these cards?” Marluxia asked, deceptively innocent sounding. The tension in his voice was obvious, but Xigbar still appreciated that Marluxia wasn’t trying to be defensive on purpose. This was just how he was. Guarded.

He was hiding something. How could Xigbar blame him for that?

“I figured you needed a bit of prodding, honestly.” He fucked up. “You’re still looking for things that don’t exist. A trip down memory lane would be good for you. Beneficial in more ways than one.”

“Who made these?” Marluxia asked. “They are meant to be used, but I crafted the ones for Sora while he was here. I deliberately manipulated him as per Xemnas's orders. This feels like more of the same. From a different source.” Marluxia pointedly looked at Xigbar, prying him open like an old tome.

Xigbar had fucked up so badly, it clawed at the inside of his chest. He was going to have to lie. He had to lie or he was going to scare Marluxia off and be forced to pull the trigger. He desperately didn’t want to do that. It pained him to know that he had no other practical choice. Xigbar swallowed calmly, his mouth drying up. Damn, this neophyte never knew when to let things be, did he?

“I don’t really know.” Filthy filthy fucking liar. “If I had to guess, I’d say Vexen under Xemnas’s orders. Remember how he’s paranoid. Just like you. Maybe he’s expecting you to falter while you’re stumbling over yourself.”

_Please, take the bait. Please._

Marluxia’s eyes glowered, organizing thoughts and filing things away. “Of course. I won’t be granted amnesty until I do it.”

_That’s right. Come to your own conclusions._

“And that’s why he wants you here,” Marluxia continued, frowning. “So you can watch me die.”

“I am not exempt from his paranoia unfortunately. Hate to break it to you, kiddo.”

Xigbar’s internal trembling rocked him to the core. He was only able to school himself into that amicable and carefree persona because he’d been doing it for a decade or so. It was easy now. However, that clawing in his chest didn’t stop just because his finger was off the trigger once more. It was far too easy for him to slide back into the sniper’s position especially with Marluxia's constant questioning. If Xemnas ever fully understood what Marluxia was working himself towards, not even Xigbar's misdirection would help.

Marluxia sighed and rose to his feet. “Then I suppose I really have no choice for now. Don’t touch anything.”

Xigbar crossed his fingers over his heart. “Hope to die.”

“Funny.”

 

\---

 

“Do you think we are any closer to finding him?” Repliku asked. “This place feels like it’s only getting bigger. I don’t remember it being this convoluted before.”

Namine remained woefully uncertain. “It’s changing. Something’s affecting its magic, I think. Maybe it’s trying to do the same thing to the other residents as it did to Sora.”

“I don’t really feel much different, honestly. This place is just bigger.” Repliku paused. “You mean kill us?”

Namine shook her head. “The Castle didn’t kill Sora. He’s not dead. Just...lost.”

“Right.”

“It might not hurt to have a little faith,” Namine said. “I’m trying the best I can.”

“You are. I’m sorry.”

Silence threaded between them. Namine tried to stay optimistic, but Repliku was right. This place was changing around them as they moved and Namine was so out of sync with the magical field around the castle, that she might as well have never been there before. It was just another heaping of stress to add to everything else that plagued her. Returning was a mistake. She should have left; she should have figured out a different path.

“I know he favored the top floors,” Namine added quietly. She shivered at the idea of having to say Marluxia’s name. It felt more like a foul curse. “He considered himself the Lord of the Castle and at the top floor, there’s a throne room, if you can call it that. I’m pretty sure it’s destroyed.”

She didn’t mention it was also the last place she saw Marluxia and Sora together before Sora disappeared. Marluxia had released her afterwards, but she figured that her prison room was not the place she needed to be. In fact, if she could get away with it, she’d never go there again. She didn’t believe that she could handle it. Not now. And maybe not ever.

“What a snake,” Repliku replied, teeming with hatred. “Of course he would hang around up there. He thinks he’s better than everyone else. He thinks that he’s won his little fight. I’m going to prove him wrong.”

Namine remained silent. Repliku’s aura reeked of evil and spite, but she couldn’t bring herself to even attempt to temper that rage. To her, it was justified. Repliku deserved to hate the people responsible for his creation and manipulation. He deserved to lash out and not know how to feel about being what he was.

But another, deeper, part of her feared that the rage would be reflected onto her. Rightfully so, because she had created a past for him and memories to cherish. All lies by her hand. Repliku’s scorn burned her because she knew that at some point, she would have to walk into those fires and burn to ash. Rightfully so.

Rightfully so.

Her skin prickled.

The two of them climbed a countless number stairs, wandered through endless hallways and through door after door. It was accompanied mostly by silence. Sometimes, Repliku would attempt to spark conversation, but he wasn’t exceptionally charming. He was stiff and brittle, and annoyed most of the time. Namine found herself trying to conform to whatever he needed to calm down in order to temper his energy into something easily digestible. She intensely disliked doing this, but she had no other choice now.

The throne room was an apt descriptor of what once was a delicate and refined space meant for grandiose posturing and battles to the death. Though most of the rubble had been cleaned up and a lot of dust had settled since Sora’s disappearance, the throne room was still in disarray. It was all wrong, teeming with negative space. The most obtuse part about it was the smashed throne.

There was no one there.

“He’s not here,” Repliku sighed. “So much for that.”

“No,” Namine replied. “He’s here. He’s just hiding.”

“Come out you coward!” Repliku lurched forward, summoning a devious looking weapon and looking around frantically. He was ready for a fight. Begging for it, even. “I have a bone to pick with you!”

“What are the kids doing out of the daycare, huh?” Namine froze. That wasn’t Marluxia. “Get your own toy.”

Repliku snarled, but Namine put a hand out to stop him. “Are you Xemnas?”

“As if.”

Namine trembled. “We’re not going to hurt Marluxia. We just want to talk.”

Repliku shot Namine a filthy look, but Namine returned the look with one of pleading. Repliku, respectfully, remained silent, though his grip on the hilt of his sword grew tighter. Namine searched the room, and found no sign of their adversary.

“I don’t think he really has time for you, girl. He’s busy looking for someone. Or something.” A chuckle.

Xigbar and Marluxia were sequestered away behind some of the less obvious damage, Marluxia looking more than a little cross with Xigbar’s fooling around. Xigbar had a knack for throwing his voice, and he cupped his hands over his mouth to choke the laughter before it had a chance to emerge. Complete control over space afforded him many flashy abilities. This was among his favorite for fucking with people.

“You’d know all about that, wouldn’t you?” Xigbar continued.

“Show yourself!” Repliku growled.

“Or else, what? Going to punch me? Try it, kid.”

Marluxia grit his teeth, though he hissed at Xigbar. “Stop being insufferable.”

“What? Am I not allowed to have fun anymore?” Xigbar hissed back.

Namine frowned. “Please. Whoever you are. I think I have an idea on how to get Sora back.”

Xigbar snorted. “Explain.”

Namine swallowed and shrugged off Repliku’s venomous stare. She had to do this. “I don’t really know how to explain it. Maybe...call it a hunch...

“I don’t know! I wasn’t lying when I said I had no idea what happened to Sora, and I will stand by that. I just. I just know that, even though I don’t want to ever see Marluxia again, he knew how to keep me focused. I don’t have to like it, but for now, I do need to acknowledge it because Sora is gone because of me, too.

“We...we were going to be friends afterwards. Maybe. I hoped.”

She faltered and her voice wilted away. Repliku’s hateful eyes remained studiously on her. He would leap at her command because even though he hated that she manipulated him, he hated the putrid Nobodies who did this to her more for right now. His ire was indiscriminate, but his developing sense of self was not. Though how much he longed to cut bodies down.

“What do you make of them?” Xigbar whispered to Marluxia.

“I told you she would come back,” Marluxia replied. “I don’t really care what you do with the replica.”

Xigbar quirked an eyebrow. “If you say so.” He returned his attention to Namine. “Well, well, well, princess. Seems you’ve gotten yourself in a bit of a jam. I don’t know where that little flowery traitor went. Too bad, so sad. He's smart for hiding when he knows he's being hunted.”

Namine and Repliku both tensed.

“Tell you what, when you find him, remind me to thank you for leading me right to my target. I’ve been itching to bury a bullet between those pretty eyes. Hopefully you can get your hands on him before I do.” A brief pause. “Xemnas never liked a traitor.”

Xigbar vanished.

Repliku took a deep breath. “That didn’t really do much for us, did it?”

Namine was still trembling. “I...I disagree…”

“I don’t understand.”

“I...When he released me, he told me that Xemnas was going to kill him, remember? Sora was going to help him take Xemnas down. Sora understood that he was desperate. I think...I think whoever that was is going to finish the job once Sora is back.”

Repliku grimaced. “How do you know they aren’t just manipulating you?”

Namine smiled weakly. “I know they are manipulating me. I’m just used to it. But I’m not going to let them control every move I make anymore. I’m going to figure something out. I just don’t know what. I just need to plan. Somewhere away from prying eyes.”

“I think I know a good place,” Repliku said. “But, I don’t want to go back in there.”

“Where’s that?”

Repliku took another, slow, deep breath and dropped his voice down to barely a whisper. Namine had to lean close and strain to hear him. “On the lowest floor of the basement, there’s a...lab. I don't know what it was supposed to be used for, but I do know that's where I was born. Or created.”

Namine nodded. “Then let’s make our way down. Do you remember how to get there?”

“...Vaguely.”

 

\---

 

As the hours slid by, Zexion found himself wandering. An exceptionally dangerous and often senseless action. He had no other place to go, and despite his best efforts, he was sinking into a vat of fear and hopelessness.

This was expected, he’d told himself as he clutched Lexaeus’s hand. He’d seen the paperwork. The research. Vexen’s lab in Castle Oblivion was one of the better kept secrets within the ranks. Unspeakable and hellish creations had been designed and motivated there. It was a safe haven as much as it was a hellhole, and Zexion had gone looking for information once he recognized Marluxia’s and Xigbar’s scents together. That would keep them - or at least, Xigbar - out of his hair for long enough to go looking for what he needed.

The files were numerous, scratched into paper with sloppy and hastily jotted shorthand. It was almost unintelligible nonsense, but Zexion had been Vexen’s assistant for so long, that this madman’s language was easily decipherable at a glance. The news was grim.

The realizations grimmer.

He’d contemplated just allowing the Heartless to consume him, but that would have been painful and it would just restart a process he had discovered was inevitable. He’d also considered forcing Lexaeus under because anything else was better than the reality. He could steel himself enough to build a barrier between him and his companion.

That wouldn’t be enough.

As Zexion wandered, eyes trained on the tiles, it became explicitly clear to him that there was no other alternative. He was a container for someone else’s exploits and it overwhelmed him with a sense of betrayal almost. He made a valiant attempt to push it away. Get it out of his head, ignore the pit in his chest and his unsettled stomach. If he just applied himself better - more efficiently - he wouldn’t have to deal with it.

Not terribly effective in the long run, but it did help him in the moment. Dangerous decisions were going to have to be made soon, but before Zexion committed himself to ending that path to damnation, he had to get a better idea of what exactly he was dealing with. Vexen’s research and notations were pretty cut and dry. This was obviously information that had not reached eyes in powerful places. It almost seemed to him that that could have been a reason to withdraw contact with those in the castle.

A reasonable, if tragic, reason.

Xigbar’s presence made a lot more sense all of a sudden.

Zexion hurried off, burying the entrance to Vexen’s private quarters under a thick and robust film of illusion. It would never be seen by eyes not meant to see them. It was the last thing he could really do for Vexen now. The last thing he likely would ever do if Xemnas or Xigbar caught wind of it.

He had to get back to tracking Riku. If he continued his facade, he could gather what he needed without falling to the blade of a sword. That was the ideal outcome in all of this. Riku falls, Zexion is able to escape the shifting walls of this forsaken place. And he...what?

Runs?

He wouldn’t be able to run if he was still attached fundamentally to a man with sinister intentions. He reasoned that perhaps this was just a test. Xemnas was not a man who trusted easily. Testing his organization’s devotion and loyalty was seen somewhat of a joke within the lower ranks, but it was becoming crystal clear that there was not an ounce of humor in those previous jests. A neophyte’s way of warning without notice.

How could he have been so self absorbed, that he missed all the obvious signs? The signals were warnings and the warnings were detrimental. His nose itched, and he drew up the hood of his cloak in a swift motion, straightening his back (when had he begun slumping?).

He kept his forward momentum until he came face to face with Riku, who reeked of darkness. This was an all too familiar scenario. Riku, another experiment in tainting hearts and manipulating perfectly normal people into selling themselves into servitude. All for a taste of power that wouldn’t matter once they were consumed.

“You!” Riku cried, weapon out, eyes wide with fury.

Zexion froze in place. Was this going to be how he died? Oddly, he smiled. “Interesting. You have incredible comedic timing, Riku. You should be proud. It’s not often someone I don’t like gets a smile out of me.”

“It’s not funny,” Riku growled. “I’m tired of all your games. This ends today. Right now.”

“No,” Zexion replied. “It ended long ago from my perspective.” A long pause as Riku shifted. “Just get it over with.”

“What?” Riku hesitated, his muscles growing tense. “This is another game!”

“I have little desire in fighting, Riku.” Zexion hummed softly. “I’d consider this more as an experiment than anything else. I don’t have to like it...Whether you kill me or not doesn’t matter. You’ve already sold yourself like a fool. As anticipated. I do not envy you. Get on with it.”

There was something oddly freeing about just giving up that facade of control. He could transport in an instant to thousands of worlds at a mere flick of thought. He could trap Riku in an illusion that would addle his brains and render him completely immobile. So why didn’t he? Why didn’t he do just that?

Riku tightened his grip on his weapon, Soul Eater, as Zexion stood in contemplation. He was rife with fear and anger and confusion, and he was standing face to face with what he assumed to be the last obstacle in his way. Why didn’t he just attack?

Riku and Zexion both came to the same realization simultaneously. Riku was shocked. Zexion, however, less so.

“You want to die,” Riku said. “That’s what this is about.”

Zexion made a slight non committal gesture. “Think what you like.”

“Why?”

Zexion narrowed his eyes, though Riku couldn’t see them. “What does it matter? Consider it an internal struggle of massive proportion. Indeed, the agony I feel is insurmountable. That must be the answer so get on with it.”

Riku, still poised and ready to spring into action, remained stock still. Zexion looked him over, reading every microspasm in Riku’s contemplative look. Why did he hesitate? Stupid, confounding emotions always getting in the way of every little thing. Fucking move.

“I don’t...know what to say to you.” Riku frowned, lowering his weapon. “I don’t want to kill you if you want to die.”

“You think you will talk me out of it?”

Riku grimaced. “I don’t know what to think right now. You’re in my way. I should fight you, but…that feels wrong.”

Ah, yes. Zexion took a deep breath. That was the human thing to think, wasn’t it? Striking down an unarmed person was wrong.

“Will you let me out?” Riku asked. “We both don’t want to be here, anyway. I don’t see why we can’t mutually agree on this at least.”

Zexion was taken aback. “That is not up to me. It never was.”

“Who is it up to?”

“Xemnas.” Zexion frowned deeper. “But you would know him by a different name.”

“Where is he?”

“Not here.”

Riku grit his teeth, forcing himself to not sink into the darkness to wring information out of his cryptic companion. That would do nothing constructive. An annoying way of speaking wasn’t grounds to attack. Even to this exact moment, Zexion hadn’t raised a hand against him. “Then where?”

“I don’t know.”

“We are not going to get very far if you keep talking like this,” Riku pushed. “I’m not going to attack you. I...might not attack you. If we can be allies.”

Zexion remained silent. This was traitor talk and his nose itched. The Superior’s - Xemnas’s - darkness flowed off Riku in waves, though it was actively being snuffed out by something Riku was doing. Light.

“We will never be allies,” Zexion said firmly. “But, we can stop being enemies for the time being. Make no mistake, if you attempt to attack me, you will be stopped.”

Riku inhaled sharply. Was that a threat?

“I will start by sharing some information.” What a traitor. He was a traitor. “Sora was deposed.”

“What?” Riku cried, voice brimming with disbelief. “Impossible! Sora would never! Not by you.”

Zexion blinked, almost in awe of how stupid Riku sounded. “No, not by me. But he was defeated. You will find no trace of him here anymore. He’s disappeared to a place unknown and I only know of one person who might have something to do with it.” Traitor, traitor, traitor… “As far as I know, they are looking for him.”

Another, equally hideous feeling welled in his chest as he spoke. Watching Riku respond so genuinely and desperately made him tingle with apprehension. The stench of darkness so obviously indicative of Riku’s instability. This alliance would not last. He knew it. He knew he would be labeled a traitor and be killed for insubordination. He knew all of this and yet he cared so little about that, it almost activated his fight or flight response. He almost drowned in panic.

Riku finally regained his emotional footing, balancing on that edge of madness as well, though perhaps in a different way than Zexion was. “Let me out of here.”

“I cannot do that,” Zexion responded. “I will merely let you pass me without incident. Those I control will allow you passage without incident as well. That is all I will offer.”

Riku paused. “Why are you helping me? All this time, you’ve been nothing but obstacles. The big one.”

Zexion gasped softly. Lexaeus would be so upset with him for faltering so badly. “He is better off dead.” The truth really did feel so disgusting to say. “Do not think I am helping you, specifically. That is a foolish conclusion to come to. Dangerous. I am merely stepping aside. That action benefiting you is just a coincidence in this particular instance.”

“Wouldn’t it be easier to just attack me?”

“Wouldn’t it be easier for you to stay focused on your own problems?”

Riku frowned. “I don’t have much choice, do I? Not really.”

“You can still attack me if you wish, Riku,” Zexion said. “I will not stop you and I will apply deliberate effort to not instinctively retaliate to survive. You are the one who won’t strike me. That is not my fault, nor is it my responsibility. I anticipated you to cut me down in blind rage. Seems I was mistaken.

“Please move on, Riku, unless you are going to kill me. I am not your enemy. I never even really was.”

Riku, though still on edge, inched closer and closer to Zexion. The tension between them - entirely one sided - wound around Zexion like a noose, threatening to snap his neck as soon as he fell from the edge. The closer Riku came, the more Zexion felt that there would be a sword in his gut. He almost wanted to beg for it. Because as soon as Riku passed him, he knew he had sealed his own fate.

Despite the swirling cloud of accusations and the tumultuousness of Sora’s deposition, Axel’s assignment had been to get rid of all the traitors. Zexion had always known this. Even when Saix deliberately declined his request to watch Marluxia and his ilk. He’d seen the looks shared between Saix and Axel. He’d smelled it. Axel wore his pride on his sleeves because Axel was too absorbed in himself and his games to really worry about deceit and lying to stay on the good side of those who mattered.

Zexion felt suspiciously like he was being watched. The concentric rings of a target pinned to his shoulders, an appropriate weight given what his actions would undoubtedly contribute to. It was only a matter of time.

It also seemed like now was as good a time as any to make an ally.

 

\---

 

Once Marluxia had been wrangled back into compliance (again after a strained and vague conversation), and the children sent off to play, Xigbar felt the tug of Xemnas’s control over him. At first, he had welcomed it, but now that he was walking on a razor’s edge with his heels sore and raw, the implications and the reality were becoming much clearer to not only himself, but to Xemnas as well.

Xigbar was prepared for bullshit, but he wasn’t prepared for how much. Even as he warped back to Xemnas’s study, that confidence and aloofness was squashed under the boot of the christened “Superior”. And oh, how did that title suit him.

See, Xemnas had this way about him that made him equally a force to be reckoned with and an unconditional lover. This mysterious aura that floated around him made lying near impossible, and defiance, no matter how strong it seared the flesh, evaporated into smoke the second one was within the radiance of that cloud.

Xemnas reeked of superiority, not just because of his confidence and ruthlessness, but because he quite literally, was better than all of them. The way he would share glances would melt any and all facades, and behind the veil of love, was a pool of horrid secrets.

There simply was no comparison. When in Xemnas’s presence, there was only one thing there other than yourself. No, even your sense of self was diminished to rubble. Xigbar hated it because…

He was never ready for it. Even after all this time.

“So good of you to join me for this meeting,” Xemnas sighed. “I was beginning to think that you would never come.”

Xigbar somehow felt guilty, like he had betrayed Xemnas in some way even though he was only doing his job as ordered. Xigbar also knew that - somehow - Xemnas wanted it this way. “Sorry, Bossman, you know how it is.”

“Indeed, I do.” Uncomfortable silence, though only because Xigbar couldn’t stop squirming. “How go the operations at Castle Oblivion? I trust something has changed?”

“Lexaeus is still hanging on by a thread. If you could even call it that,” Xigbar replied. “I went to, uh, check on him like you asked. Zexion was still watching over him.”

“Mhm.” Xemnas fell silent, contemplating. “I suspected that. It’s not easy to come back from the brink of death for us. Makes it all the more detrimental that I understand the outcome of his condition, whether he lives or dies. It no longer matters.”

Xigbar squirmed even more. Something didn’t feel right, though that should have been impossible in Xemnas’s presence. His heart should have been stilled by now, dormant. In fear or in habit didn’t matter. The pounding only grew more obvious. Even Xemnas should have been able to hear it.

“What of Axel?” He asked, turning his attention to the fullness of Kingdom Hearts. He was contemplative once more. Distracted and in total awe of the massive structure. “Has he shown up to fight?”

“I thought you’d be the first to know,” Xigbar said, shrugging. “Nothing to be worried about. He’s been stopped.”

“But not killed.”

Xigbar raised an eyebrow. “No, not killed.” _WHAT WAS HE PLANNING?_

Xemnas sighed again, pinching the bridge of his nose and making disappointed sounds. “I have my doubts, Xigbar. There are very few that I can trust in this position. I send ample firepower to Castle Oblivion to bring another Keybarer to me and all but four have perished. One is barely able to maintain form. One is a traitor. Two are scheming. What more shall I allow? How much more insubordination before I offer corrective guidance?”

Xigbar did not like the way these questions sounded one bit. Guilt stabbed him and Xemnas was twisting the knife without so much as a feigned apology. As it should have been. They both should have been like this. They all should have been like this.

“Then offer corrective guidance,” Xigbar said finally, though his jaw clenched just a bit. “If you feel the two who are contemplating or testing boundaries are straying from your vision…” he swallowed, “then punish them as you see fit. Bring them back to their roots. You don’t really need my permission, Bossman.”

Xemnas looked at him, eyes piercing through him like he was little more than an artfully crafted window. “I don’t need your permission, Xigbar. But I do require your attention. Undivided.”

Uh oh. Xigbar took a slow and steady breath. In a mere instant, Xemnas was face to face with him. He didn’t have to raise a hand or even speak to make his will known. Xigbar could just tell the instant it was thought. That’s what he got for allying himself in a brief period of desperation as his final moments were upon him. This was what he had given up when he was still a sorry excuse for a human being - and that was being generous. This was what he gave up to have access to power.

Regret, like respect, came in many different flavors.

“What’s my test?” Xigbar asked, slyly. He was still an agent. Still an underling. But he was also still Xigbar. He’d earned it. “Paranoid as always, Xemnas. I’ll forgive you, but just this once.” He winked in his usual fashion. All body language, which was still surprisingly natural despite his head about to burst with stress. “Lay it on me.”

“For what it is worth,” Xemnas started. “It wouldn’t have been this way if Marluxia died like he was supposed to.”

Xigbar was expressionless.

“He was supposed to be a benchmark for Sora’s capabilities,” Xemnas continued. “He was supposed to indicate just how powerful a weapon the Keyblade was. Just how impertinent it was to the completion of Kingdom Hearts. Sora was supposed to show me just how powerful he really was.

“Alas, I must have missed something. All the pieces were in place. The stage was set. I was waiting for him to triumphantly proclaim that I would be next. I was waiting for this. Working for this for so long and so easily it slipped from my grasp. So easily, that was torn away from me. From us. From this.”

With a gentle and fluid motion, Xemnas gestured to Kingdom Hearts. It did not answer whatever internal plea Xemnas made to it. It was glaring down on the two of them, illuminating the thousands of books upon Xemnas’s shelves and lighting up those drilling eyes. Xigbar, again, expressionless. He already knew what was coming, and he was going to have to remain as still as possible. Itchy fingers, but they had to remain motionless. Down.

Xemnas blinked slowly, lost once more in the light of the perverted moon. “I am sorry, my friend. I must do this to you so that I do not feel like I must cull you to maintain our trajectory. To give you the restrictions of an unstable body and mind would be unfair to you. You gave yourself up to me for this purpose. To see it fail. To see your desires fall to the wayside. That is no way to return to life.”

“Are you going to kill me?”

Xemnas shook his head. “Not if I don’t have to. But I am going to test you. Saix experienced something similar.” There was a disturbing pause between them and Xigbar, briefly, envisioned all the horrible things Xemnas must have done to beat Isa’s fledgling defiance into Saix. “He is as he is meant to be.”

Xigbar smiled jovially. “As you wish, Bossman. Lay it on me.”

Xemnas returned the smile. “I’m sorry, Xigbar.”

Xigbar, for one second, believed him. That was the final nail in his coffin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha, did I say it was going to be 10 years for the next update? I meant like 3 weeks. Haha. Hahaha...I'm not gonna lie, knowing people are actually reading my stuff helped immensely. I make no estimations on when the next chapter will be done, but I already started on it before I even put this up so that might mean something.
> 
> Thanks for sticking around.


	5. How It Bleeds

The pull was unmistakable. Marluxia had gone back to searching for Vexen’s lab because he did not for one moment believe that Xigbar had really moved all that research. Marluxia had worked with Vexen before. In a state of listlessness, but Marluxia was no less observant. Vexen was the one who had taught him about the finer details of learning from the environment because at the time, Demyx was too nubile and unaccustomed to working. Vexen, as a man of science, was a more than adequate substitute.

The one thing Marluxia had learned of the other was that he was anal to a fault. A coward when it came to fighting, but an otherwise brilliant and seemingly incorruptible explorer of the truth of the worlds. A mastermind in his own respects. Marluxia had seen how articulate Vexen was. How thorough.

How granular..

If Vexen had, indeed, learned of something that would turn the entire Organization on its head, he would have done so under the veil of something else. No matter how much Xemnas rambled about the physicality and possibilities of the heart, Marluxia knew better than to take all those statements as absolute truth. In this instance, Vexen’s perspective was worth far more. More than anything Marluxia could ever tangibly provide in sheer manpower.

But Vexen was dead, and it was his fault. He’d made the order. As a test of Axel’s loyalty. And as far as Marluxia knew, the only one who knew that was himself...and Axel.

So when he felt Xemnas’s influence over him, nagging him to come back to the Castle, Marluxia had little choice but to walk out of the pristine - though superficially tarnished - Castle Oblivion, and right into an ambush.

He’d been afforded approximately two seconds to understand his surroundings before he was blindsided. See, that was another of Xemnas’s unique abilities. When total control over what Nothingness was and could be was at one’s fingertips, attempts to retaliate often failed. That was truly what made Xemnas not just superior, but “The Superior”. It was truly what made him the ruler over subjects and not a leader among equals. It was never more apparent than when Xemnas tested his closest subordinates for whatever weakness he was looking for.

It was never obvious what Xemnas was looking for.

In the first moment, Marluxia saw every mistake that lead him to this point. Allowing Xigbar to mold him into a vicious and sharpened tool for excising tumors from dying worlds; accepting his proof of existence and new “purpose”; following orders for so long without question; trusting Xigbar to keep his secrets in those moments of physical depravity; accepting Xemnas’s summons. He’d had enough rationale to not clench his jaw, or his teeth would break. It was all he was able to do in an instant.

In the second moment? Marluxia recognized all his attempts to reach for Graceful Dahlia were severed. His natural connection to the pocket of space that held his weapon had been deftly and precisely severed. To even attempt burned like a white hot poker lancing just under his skin. All his hairs stood on end, making his pink hair poof a little, and his rationale to not clench his teeth battled with the searing flames that cauterized him. He was, in just longer than an instant, completely rendered powerless. His gasps went unanswered, the pure instinctual need to just make it through this experience overshadowed much of whatever else filed through his mind’s eye, and he couldn’t understand why this was happening to him.

He hadn’t even realized that he was in the Grey Area. He hadn’t even realized he’d been moved.

The weight of Saix’s body on top of his own was suffocating. Marluxia had one arm brandished in front of his face. With no access to a weapon and a scrambling line of thought, it was the best he could do in the flashes of white and yellow that blurred in his vision. The rest of his fighting spirit was numbed by ignorance, but he still had that spark of autonomy. Enough to raise his arm. Enough to handle Saix’s teeth digging into the leather of his coat.

But not much more than that.

He couldn’t stay in one place, however. Saix was attacking him for reasons unknown, and Marluxia knew he wouldn’t be able to contend with Saix’s raw strength, especially given the fullness of the moon. Saix looked savage, feral, murderous, and totally out of his mind. Marluxia had mere moments to figure something out before Saix tore through him. He had to do something.

Like Graceful Dahlia, corridors of darkness were unavailable to him. The best he could do was use his free hand to strike at the hollow of Saix’s neck. In an efficient and targeted jab, Saix released Marluxia’s forearm and Marluxia was able to pull his legs up enough to launch Saix’s bodyweight over his head and off him. He was immediately on his feet after that, with Saix not that far behind him, though he was struggling to breathe.

From the way Saix lurched after him, lumbering like a wild beast, Marluxia had the faintest suspicion that he didn’t have a weapon either, and whatever was happening to him was happening to Saix as well. They were caged together, weaponless, having to do whatever it was that would get them out of this hole. Saix was unreasonable now, raging and unable to think clearly enough for Marluxia to even hazard speaking to him. Not that he thought Saix would listen even if totally calm.

He reached out for Graceful Dahlia again, and was greeted with total silence.

“So, it really is like that,” he murmured.

Marluxia was able to glance around as he danced with Saix’s savagery, gathering snippets of information as he weaved through furniture and occasionally found himself in Saix’s grip once more. Each time Marluxia was unable to keep enough distance, he was thrown, slammed, and bitten, and each time he was able to escape, he felt his chances of survival dwindling. His arms pulsed where Saix had gnashed into his flesh, and he could feel the wounds beginning to swell. The pain was raw and hot, but not blinding.

At some point, in the swirl of madness, he was able to pull the cords of his hood free, and he quickly tied his hair up to keep it out of his face. Drenched in sweat and running out of options, Marluxia went on the offensive, using Saix’s raw strength to break the furniture around them into more manageable and useful parts. Nothing outlandish, but a severed couch leg made for a great weapon in desperate times. Used appropriately, Marluxia could dig it into an exposed area. Not the neck; he didn’t want to kill the other, just immobilize. If that.

Was Xemnas watching them? Was Xemnas even aware that his dragon was on the loose, barreling through the place like an untrained hound? He had to have been. He had to have set this up.

The wheels were spinning. Saix had incredible stamina, and without a honed weapon, Marluxia was barely able to put a dent in Saix’s bulk. It made so much more sense that Saix was meant to be the second to last line of defense in this hypothetical scenario in which Marluxia was able to waltz in and usurp Xemnas from his position. It made so much more sense that he - Marluxia - would be in this situation far earlier than he meant to be because it made more sense for Xemnas to assume he was a traitor than it did for him to assume innocence. Marluxia was paying a price, though he wanted to believe it wasn’t even his price to pay. Leaders didn’t do this.

Except he knew that wasn’t true. If Marluxia had been in Xemnas’s position, he would have done the exact. Same. Thing.

Poetic justice? Or irony?

Elsewhere, Xemnas and Xigbar observed them. Xemnas stared the two of them down from his wall of obscurity. His manipulation of Nothingness was so sublime that he could exist in the same makeshift arena without either of the combatants sensing or otherwise noticing his presence. They’d feel it for sure, but they didn’t need weapons anyway. They would manifest their own when the time came. He was certain.

Xigbar stood at Xemnas’s side, face neutral. His test, obviously, would be his mentee. The one he recruited. The one he couldn’t stop thinking about sometimes. Curse Xemnas’s keen observation. Oh, that knife felt so good lodged in his stomach. If only Xemnas would take his damn hand off the hilt.

“He’s so capable,” Xemnas remarked sternly, eyes burrowing into Marluxia’s back. “Skilled fighter. Excellent swordsman. Adaptive. Cunning. Well honed and sharp. Strong and smart.”

Xigbar shrugged. “What use is a dull blade? You make yourself very clear when you want to.”

Xemnas narrowed his eyes. “Indeed. I trust I do not need to explain why he is also dangerous. It takes a lot more than cunning and strength to defeat a Keybarer. I lot more than a sharp blade to end that sort of light.”

“The ones in the basement seem to think otherwise,” Xigbar said. “Something about Castle Oblivion itself meddling with Sora. I won’t know until I’ve found Vexen’s playground.”

“About that.” Xemnas pointedly looked at Xigbar, obviously studying every inch of his face. “Why haven’t you found it, yet?”

“The Castle is a lot more alive than I think anybody realized until now.” God it was hard to control himself. Even while focused, he could see Marluxia in his peripherals, getting beaten to a pulp. “I think there was one tiny thing you forgot to mention to me before I ended up joining these kids in Castle Oblivion. It changes over time. No wonder I can’t find anything. Nothing’s ever in the same place. Kind of rude if you ask me, Bossman. I’ve lost at least three pairs of socks because of you.”

Xemnas sighed. “Yes. You don’t bother reading the reports. Hardly my fault you don’t take things nearly as seriously as you should. It’s why we’re here. It was wrong of me to test you this way. But if it is of any consolation, I was not trying to harm you. I wanted to see if either of them would bring forth the gift I bestowed upon them. This is the most effective way to do it. Desperation, survival, instinct. That is what it’s drawn to.”

Xigbar hated himself for beaming at the veiled praise, for that was what this was. He was being praised for being a heartless shell of a horrible man. He played the part well. A little too well, he’d come to find in his later ramblings. “I’ve seen a lot of shit, Xemnas. Beating up my favorite recruit is not going to change anything.”

“You’re right.” Xemnas cleared the weariness from his eyes. “What was I even thinking? I should be more efficient with my administration. More direct.” A pause. “It was a shame Vexen had to die the way he did. He would have loved to see this.”

Xigbar’s stomach squeezed itself into knots. He almost vomited despite having nothing in his physical stomach.

Marluxia, still in his violent dance with Saix, was dwindling. He’d been able to lash against Saix’s advances for quite some time now, but when Saix had caught him, he’d have to take quite a few blows before he could redirect that forward momentum. His face was littered with scratches, his arms weakened where holes in his coat appeared along with deeper gashes in his chest and along his thighs. Saix looked no worse for wear. Agitated, his scar expanded with whatever energy Saix used to slaughter his competition.

For a moment, Xigbar looked to Kingdom Hearts, seeming to join Xemnas in revering it as a divine being looming over them, ready to judge. If only a cloud would appear to blot it out so Saix wouldn’t be channeling that artificial ire.

“Would you like to see something I’ve been working on?” Xemnas asked, his voice just barely masking perverse excitement. “I think you’ll enjoy it as well.”

Xigbar, against his better judgement, nodded.

Xemnas waved his hands, fingers barely twitching as the facade of his warped control over the environment snapped back to the Grey Area as Xigbar had always known it, though there were splashes of red to accompany the silver and white now. Small tendrils of blue and pink as well. They’d really done a number on each other, though Xigbar subdued a small bud of pride knowing that Marluxia had been able to hold his own for so long until now. He’d betrayed himself, though, as his fingers curled minutely.

As soon as Marluxia saw Xemnas, he nearly panicked, and in that split second, Saix had Marluxia by the back of his head, hand curled in his hair and claws digging into his scalp. The warmth of crimson and rust pooled around those claws and Marluxia arched back, pain lancing through his body as he snarled. His nose and mouth were bloodied from taking too many jabs in the face, and a few flecks of it landed on the bridge of Saix’s nose.

“Marluxia,” Xemnas whispered. “My sincerest apologies.”

Marluxia’s response, though still a vicious snarl, was stymied by Xemnas’s overwhelming presence. He’d never experienced Xemnas like this before. “Call off your attack dog. I’ve done nothing to warrant this.”

“This is true,” Xemnas replied. “You’ve been nothing if not loyal. You’ve done exactly as directed. I shouldn’t have done this to you, or to Xigbar.”

Unfiltered loathing flashed across Marluxia’s cerulean eyes before it was wicked away by pain. Xigbar had seen it, and immediately he drowned in anguish. This was his fault. Silly, stupid, foolish, old man.

“Then what is the meaning of this?” Marluxia hissed. “...Sir. I’m still investigating the Keybarer’s disappearance.”

Xemnas bristled with anticipation. “I have few qualms about your loyalty, Marluxia, but I must admit that I have been a little impatient. I figure you, who has shown his devotion so genuinely, would accept my final order before I restore you to who you ought to be.

“You may return to Castle Oblivion shortly.”

Marluxia called this bluff, but did not verbalize it. Xemnas was going to kill him and Xigbar was going to do nothing because in this instance, the only one here who was actually noncompliant was him. Marluxia thought about struggling. Thought about perhaps striking out with every last ounce of strength he had to inflict a wound. A final act of defiance because going out with a final swing was better than kneeling before a tyrant who only saw him and his body as a commodity with a fancy price tag affixed to his brow.

The troubling thing was, Marluxia wanted to believe Xemnas wasn’t going to hurt him. He wanted to believe that apology even though he knew it wasn’t true and he knew Xemnas was concealing something. That overwhelming sense of superiority afforded Xemnas the false blanket of sincerity. It was a trap. He was a ruler, and when his subordinates wouldn’t give him what he wanted, he would take it from them. This was just another one of his rights as “The Superior”.

Xigbar cleared his throat. “Do you really think you need to intimidate him like that?” He smiled, a polished veneer of practice. “Not sure what’s on your mind, Bossman, but you need a nap. Cranky.”

Xemnas chuckled. All the while Marluxia had been restrained, Saix had been building energy in his hands. It struggled to coalesce, but it seemed like it was attempting to form a shape. All the while Xemnas had been monologing as usual, Xigbar had kept that odd gesture Saix had in his periphery so he could mind his manners, but also point out when whatever Xemnas was waiting for didn’t happen.

“Ah, forgive me,” Xemnas said after carefully watching Saix struggle to control that energy. Xemnas, having known what to look for, could see that it had failed as well. “Getting carried away. Alas, I do find that what I’ve sent out to achieve is not yet ready. I was hoping for something with more flair, especially from you, Marluxia. Do see that you hone your skills, for the next time you find yourself in the presence of a Keyblade wielder, it might not necessarily be a being of Light. It is my understanding that another stalks the halls looking for you for being a murderer.”

Marluxia, immediately, felt binded with guilt. He hadn’t even realized Saix had let him go. He’d disappointed Xemnas in some fashion and had no idea what that could have been. He knew it was a bluff, another tactical application of language that pressed at buttons Marluxia didn’t even know he still had, and yet, he was trembling with the weight of being a failure in the eyes of their leader. His leader.

“See to it that you find Sora,” Xemnas continued, calmly. “And, Marluxia?”

Marluxia jolted. “Yes, Lord Xemnas?”

Xemnas’s lips quirked up into a wry smirk. A knowing one. “If you ever encounter straying thoughts in your travels. You know what you must do.”

_ He knew. _ “Yes, Lord Xemnas. As ordered.”

Marluxia was enveloped in darkness and returned to Castle Oblivion by Xemnas’s hand, fractured, but more determined than ever. It was official. Xemnas pegged him as a traitor - maybe - but one thing was for certain. Xigbar has dragged him into a mess, which made Xigbar an enemy, which meant that if Xigbar showed his face, Marluxia was going to kill him without hesitation.

 

\---

 

Xemnas had dismissed Xigbar after a very long lecture about the importance of organization and forethought when it came to Castle Oblivion. This was obvious punishment for not reading the report in full in the first place and Xigbar had to simultaneously not fall asleep with the droning, and keep himself from leaping across the room to punch Xemnas in the face. Odd how the two diametrically opposed sensations kept him alert enough to appear interested and attentive, but distant enough to allow his imagination to run wild.

Marluxia was never going to let him even remotely close any longer. Thanks, Xemnas.

But, Xigbar was an idiot in a lot of different ways and there was no way he was just going to let Marluxia work himself up into a frenzy unsupervised. He was likely planning on trying to get around Xemnas’s abilities, or worse, was about to do something that would get him killed. Marluxia was too eager to use whatever means necessary to criminalize Xemnas’s intentions. He would see this as a mark of contempt, and not just a slap on the wrist for them fooling around with each other.

After Xigbar arrived in Castle Oblivion once more, he found himself in the throne room, expecting Marluxia, but finding instead a smeared blood trail. Xigbar frowned. Marluxia had been near inconsolably enraged. And he’d been alone to sink deeper into his paranoia with no one to steer him to safer conclusions. There was so much blood on the floor.

Thanks, Xemnas.

The trail lead to a secluded room just outside of the main throne room. There were scrambling hand prints around the doorknob and on the door itself and Xigbar almost let it be. He’d already concluded that this was a bad idea. He’d already convinced himself that Marluxia needed to blow off steam before being interacted with. Marluxia needed time to heal before being approached. He’d known this, but he pried the door open anyway to find Marluxia kneeling on the floor, hair disheveled, with splashes of blood all around him. He was trembling violently, pale, and afraid.

Marluxia hadn’t heard Xigbar or the door, though if he had, he didn’t show it. Xigbar was silent, just barely plodding over, his heart pounding in his ears, unsure of what to expect. (Lies. He expected to be attacked in some fashion.) He squatted in front of Marluxia, making very soft and comforting noises, so he wouldn’t startle the other.

It didn’t do much to comfort Marluxia, but Xigbar had already been anticipating this despite trying to tell himself he wasn’t. Marluxia launched himself forward, his beautiful face squashed into a hideous rage as he exhausted all of his energy into rather weak punches. Xigbar deserved it. He deserved it, so he took the brunt of that violence.

Marluxia was screaming at him, threatening him, overwhelmed with fear and hatred. Xigbar couldn’t even make out what Marluxia was even saying at this point, because every word was accentuated with a swift punch in the face. His lip split, nose bent awkwardly. And Xigbar accepted it because unlike Marluxia, he still had access to magic that would heal the most severe damage. Unlike Marluxia, Xigbar had access to his weapons, and his heart ached with malice.

_ I’m going to kill him. _

“I am not your TOOL!” Marluxia spat venomously, eyes crazed and unfocused.

Xigbar was wrenched back from that internal vow, face just as smeared with blood as Marluxia’s, his expression betraying confusion and alarm. “Marluxia?”

“Stop treating me like one!” Marluxia screamed back. His wound his hands around Xigbar’s neck. There was no more strength left in him, but the message was the same and Xigbar could tell that if Marluxia had the means to, he would have slaughtered him. And Xigbar would have allowed it. “I did not ask for this life. I did not ask to become another man’s plaything. And I will kill you before I allow you to think you can be that person. I don’t care how much you inflate your own ego.”

Xigbar took a deep breath and Marluxia shook him, banging the back of his head on the tiled floor. “I didn’t think Xemnas would go after you. I thought I would be able to deflect him.”

Marluxia cackled - madness from blood loss perhaps. In an instant he recognized who he was really looking at, and immediately that disorientation was replaced with loathing. “Then you’re not paying attention. As expected because you won’t stop lusting after me.”

Xigbar couldn’t refute that. “Are you going to kill me?” Deja vu.

Marluxia frowned. “I’m going to die. I wanted to at the very least call you a fucking idiot to your face before I do. Pass the message to Xemnas while you’re at it. Hide your disbelief when he spits in your face too.”

Xigbar shifted, squirming so he could free his hands. “Let me take a look?”

“Why, so you can rub it in?” Marluxia asked, shrinking back. “Don’t bother. You led me into an ambush. And whatever it was Xemnas did is still affecting me. I can’t...heal. I can’t feel my weapons anymore. I know what it feels like to die, Xigbar. I’ve done this plenty of times before. Get the fuck away from me.”

Xigbar grit his teeth as he stood up, dragging Marluxia bodily and putting him in a chair. “Stop being such a drama queen, Peaches. You’re fine.”

This was a lie. He didn’t even sound convinced himself, but he wasn’t going to let Marluxia die, or let that pompous arrogant little shit entertain the idea either. This was just how Xemnas affected others when they weren’t on the grand stage or directly in his line of sight. Xigbar had been through it plenty of times before now. It’s what really broke him in the end now that he thought about it.

Xemnas broke others down because he was all about control. All the little jokes and pranks pulled by the younger members were just natural responses to indirectly applied force, but Marluxia, being one of the newest members respectively, was too skilled to stay in that phase for long. Everybody knew it.

Larxene died for it. Vexen died for it. Lexaeus was close to following suit.

Marluxia didn’t struggle against Xigbar. His breathing grew labored, and his movements less pronounced. For all intents and purposes, he was as mortal as any normal human being. Xigbar would have to pull himself together to nab Marluxia before his psyche shattered. Curse this fucking punk, making him work for attention. Damn it all.

“Don’t move,” Xigbar said, as he unzipped Marluxia’s coat and peeled it off him. The gashes where deep and oozing. Disgusting. “I’m going to have to do a little digging. Please forgive me.”

“What?” Marluxia replied. “Absolutely not.”

“Stop being stubborn and let me help you!” Xigbar growled.

“Actually, he’s right for once.”

Xigbar froze, spinning around, Sharpshooter aimed and trained on the intruder. Xigbar had almost killed Zexion without thinking, and his heart throbbed. God, what a fucking idiot. Zexion seemed unperturbed, blinking slowly, almost as if he was irritated by that reaction. But, perhaps, there was a veil of understanding lurking somewhere.

“Don’t sneak up on me, Shakespeare, I don’t miss.”

Zexion blinked again, uncaring. “If you go poking around in him, he’s most certainly going to die. And as it turns out, that would be a detriment to us…”

Xigbar dismissed his weapon. “What’s that supposed to mean? Confessing something?”

“Hardly.” Zexion entered the room, taking care not to step in the blood. “I’m not here for you. You’re a liability.”

Xigbar rolled his eye. “What is it with this Castle and traitors? Springing up all over the place.”

“And yet…” Zexion chose not to finish his sentence. “If you want him to not bleed out, don’t touch him. I will treat his wounds for now. They’re pretty nasty. Deep.” Reluctant in a way, he noted. Unwilling.

He didn’t bother asking for who did this to him. It was obvious. Saix had been used for some reason, which seemed like an odd choice considering who was usually sent to muscle up on the rowdier members. If Xemnas wanted to hurt Marluxia, Xigbar would have been a much better tool to use. Unless…

“Before you judge me,” Xigbar said. “This is a better outcome than the alternative.”

Zexion pulled his coat off and draped it over another chair before going into an adjacent bathroom and washing his hands. Here was his opportunity to make an ally, no matter how unorthodox. He’d originally planned on bargaining with the information he had at his disposal, but it turned out that saving lives was just as - if not more - effective for getting people to be receptive. Especially people who no longer had any power whatsoever.

“Odd,” Zexion muttered as he began inspecting Marluxia’s wounds. “Very odd.”

“I’m not getting any less nervous with you talking like that, kiddo,” Xigbar replied.

“You shouldn’t be able to be anxious all,” Zexion said, indifferent. “Should you?”

“Suppose not. Memories and the like.” Xigbar paused. “Be careful.”

“Mhm.”

Marluxia watched Zexion look him over, though he didn’t bother moving, even when the pain flared up and he felt like tiny creatures were crawling in his veins. All the pins and needles jabbing at his muscles, weighed down by guilt. Xemnas was disappointed with his performance and as much as he wanted to kick and scream and bite and claw, he was keenly aware that he was still attached to this man’s whim. Otherwise, he wouldn’t feel so devastated. He wouldn’t feel so pathetic.

How fucking ironic.

Zexion took many mental notes, all of which would be written down at a later time, though not in any sort of report going back to Xemnas. Saix was usually savage in a fight, but there was a peculiar way about the way he smashed opposition into dust. As Zexion pondered, he realized that in all the time he’d been in the presence of an actively sparring Saix, he’d never seen him shred his opponents like this. Not once. Not once in nearly ten years.

He also, became keenly aware of Xigbar’s presence. Overwhelming. Stifling. Just like before.

It never felt good to be studied. It never felt good to thread seemingly unrelated strings of thoughts together. It never felt good to recognize danger when it was already too late to do anything about it. In ten years. In ten years, it never occurred to him. Not once. And he felt like a massive failure for not being able to see the big picture.

Their eyes.

“He’s going to need an IV,” Zexion said, straightening. “I’m not going to be able to do much more than that outside of tending to the wounds and stabilizing him. These are not ordinary wounds. Do you know what happened?”

Xigbar remained uncharacteristically silent.

“That’s what I suspected,” Zexion replied softly. “Don’t move him. I’m sure I have some medical supplies in one of the storage rooms downstairs. Returning to The World That Never Was seems to not be a good play right now.”

“You’re smart,” Xigbar said, his tone neutral.

Zexion hesitated, though he did his best to sound indifferent as well. Normal. Sound normal. “I shouldn’t be longer than a few minutes.”

He shouldered his coat back on, zipped it up, and disappeared.

 

\---

 

“I don’t understand,” Repliku said, standing on the bottom most level of Castle Oblivion, hands splayed out in front of him. “It’s supposed to be right here. Or around here.”

He was staring at a blank wall. All the while they’d been traveling, the halls were silent. He and Namine couldn’t travel through Darkness together - or rather, Repliku refused to let Namine travel through it any more than absolutely necessary - so their descent had taken hours. Twenty-six floors later, and the two of them were in a far off corner of the level, in a hidden area that was chilly and silent.

Repliku could remember being here before. Vaguely, just as he had explained to Namine before. Namine was quiet for the most part, but she was also brimming with determination. This was it, this was going to be how she was going to get Sora back. Concentrate. Think of a plan. Enact it.

She’d come up with a couple ideas during their journey. She’d kept them mostly to herself, as she wasn’t sure who was out and about watching them, but they seemed reasonable enough to her. Repliku had talked a little about what he could remember of the lab he was created in. Really only vague and blurry shapes moving around and a lot of scratching sounds. He’d requested that Namine rearrange some of the false memories to make room for the real ones, but she hadn't been able to do much outside of subtly shift the blockages to other parts of his memory.

“It was here,” Repliku repeated. “A big archway. With these weird things sitting on the columns sort of.”

Namine stared at the wall. It looked no different than any other in the castle. White. Tinted blue because of the light. Sterile, clean, blank. There was nothing here, but that didn’t make Repliku wrong.

“The Castle has been changing, hasn’t it?” Namine asked. “Maybe it’s still here, but not here in this spot.”

“Hold on,” Repliku said. “Marluxia wasn't the only one of his little group here, right? Where is everyone else? Outside of that guy taunting us, we haven’t seen anyone else. And definitely not someone in a black coat. I know they’re here, but I haven’t seen them since Sora disappeared.”

Namine steeled herself. “Larxene is dead. I know that much. Vexen is also dead, but I don’t really know too much about him. I think I saw him twice ever. And then Axel and...him.”

“Anyone else?”

Namine shook her head, but almost immediately threw her hand out realization. “Wait! I remember seeing that one guy. He didn’t look very old, but he has kind of weird greyish hair. I didn’t get his name.”

Repliku narrowed his eyes. “Zexion, I think.”

“Zexion…”

“I don’t know much about him either, but I do remember running into him once. Not much of a fighter. Has some big book he does magic with. Kind of weird.”

Repliku narrowed his eyes more and approached the wall where he was certain there had been an archway. Namine followed closely, monitoring Repliku’s expression as he touched the wall. Solid.

“It was worth a shot,” he sighed. “Back to square one?”

“Maybe not,” Namine said. “Magic works kind of funny in the castle sometimes, I’ve noticed. It doesn’t always work like it’s supposed to. I don’t really know how to explain it, but I have seen it sort of move if you ask it nicely to.”

It didn’t really work like that but Namine didn’t have the words to describe it. Mostly because she couldn’t understand it herself. But if the castle was able to move and change according to memory - loosely - then the idea was that, when applied properly, memories could make Castle Oblivion move to accommodate.

It wasn’t foolproof. It barely even made sense, but Namine took Repliku’s hand in hers, much to his bewilderment, and she closed her eyes. Chain of memories. That’s what she had called it when describing it to Sora. She could rearrange memories, use them, make them physical and manipulate them.  _ She  _ could do that.

Focus was her issue. She had to focus on Sora to change his memories. She had to focus on Repliku to create his. She had to focus, and before, she had always associated Marluxia or Larxene with focus because they would talk to her the whole time. Tell her exactly what they needed. What they wanted from her. It had been a habit well worn into her psyche.

“Repliku,” Namine said. “I want to use your memories to see if I can get Castle Oblivion to obey my request. There’s no guarantee that it will work, but if you helped me focus, I think I can do it. I am asking for your permission before I do anything though.”

Repliku frowned, flinching his hand out of Namine’s. He had no idea what that would entail. Using him as a focus for her power? That sounded too much like she had every intention of treating him like a tool. Instantly, he curled his hand into a fist. No. He wasn’t a tool anymore. He hadn’t even realized that hie reflectively bared his teeth until he saw the look in Namine’s eyes.

Her expression had betrayed her. She was afraid. She’d worded this incorrectly, but it was already too late to change anything. She’d only hope that he would forgive her for being…

Human?

Prone to making mistakes just like anything else.

“I’m sorry,” Repliku replied. “I didn’t mean to. I mean. I know I want to help you.”

Repliku didn’t really look like he wanted to help in that exact moment. He looked a bit queasy all things considering. There was an internal struggle that Namine was not privy to, and wouldn’t pursue if Repliku didn’t want her to. He should be allowed to not want to do things he didn’t want to do. Even if it was a detriment to the situation. Even if it would be better or easier for him to just do it.

There was another way. There was always another way.

“I know you want to help,” Namine said. “We’ll just try something else.” Her mind immediately wandered to Marluxia and she grimaced, pushing all the doubts to the back of her mind so she could focus.

 

\---

 

Zexion had concealed himself the moment he entered the room with the medical supplies. Lexaeus was still a monolithic slab of meat on a table, but just beyond the archway to the lab, Repliku and Namine were exploring the area rather tensely. They were dangerously close to finding that his illusion was, indeed, just that.

_ Right now would have only been the perfect moment for them to get curious. _ The irony was not lost on him.

Namine had even offered to use the replica’s budded memories to try to rewrite Castle Oblivion to her whim - something Zexion didn’t think was possible by anyone so obviously inexperienced - which would immediately negate all his surface level magics and reveal the space he had acquired for himself and Lexaeus’s safety as the rest of their plans fell through. Even if they didn’t attack and only sought answers, Zexion didn’t believe that this would have been a peaceful exchange. The Riku replica was designed to be a spiteful and confrontational tool; a job well done when it came to Sora and even to Riku for the precious few times they crossed paths in the chaos.

Zexion was, once again, stuck in a position of making a traitorous choice. Reveal himself and fend them off, or let them find what, undoubtedly, would answer all of their questions. It made his skin crawl as he envisioned the Riku replica attack and cut away at Lexaeus who remained motionless. Now was not the time to have doubts. Now was not the time to falter in his judgements.

He hurriedly threw a few medical supplies into a makeshift satchel, fabricated from an unused lab coat, sleeves tied together in a knot. He had a precious few moments to say his goodbyes. To explain how far he had sunk. Lexaeus would forgive him...maybe.

Zexion carefully slipped his hand into Lexaeus’s, squeezing gently at first, though it soon became a vice grip. “Lexaeus, I want to apologize for what I am about to do to you. I want to apologize for not knowing better until now...For ignoring the obvious signs.

“I don’t have much time anymore. I thought that I would be able to sweep this up on my own.”

A very long pause. It was painful, realizing so much in such a short period of time. His throat closed up and his eyes burned with effort to not betray too much of what lay underneath the surface. His knuckles, though concealed, were white with a myriad of baseless emotions.

“I have to leave you here.” Sharp inhale. “I have to leave you here because the indifferent me would do that. The part of me that is not supposed to care. The part of me that is still loyal.”

It annoyed him that he was still so focused on his current task that he wouldn’t physically emote. Outside of the now waning lump in his throat and his less irritated eyes, he was stiff and hyper aware of how awkwardly he moved and how fake his every action was. It annoyed him that he was stuck like this. Weaker even if he didn’t wholeheartedly believe that.

Zexion stood there, leaning over Lexaeus’s body, internally screaming as he scrambled to find some sort of reassurance in himself. Depart on a more positive note. Maybe even hope that things would turn out well in the end no matter what the logic and rationale demanded of him.

“Forgive me...Zexion.” The mountain stirred.

Shock wasn’t quite what pulled Zexion out of his self-servicing melancholia. Lexaeus had spoken, softly, but genuinely. And when he heaved himself into a sitting position, Zexion hadn’t let go. The examination table squeaked and bent under the shift in weight and momentum, but Zexion still hadn't let go of Lexaeus’s hand.

“You’re alive?”

Lexaeus grimaced, though his brow remained knitted together in concern. “I am just as surprised as you are.”

Zexion looked down at the floor. At these things - these interruptions - happening at once. He was such a hypocrite, wasn’t he? “Call me an idiot for hoping. I know I’m not supposed to do that. I don’t know how to explain--”

He gasped as Lexaeus swept him up into a tight hug. That hard lump in the back of his throat returned with a vengeance, sealing his airways until he finally gave in to the stress of the world on his shoulders. Lexaeus said nothing in response, he stayed stock still as Zexion very quietly wept in his arms.

It was better this way.

“It’s...bad,” Zexion said after vainly attempting to clean his face. “The replica and Marluxia’s tool are skulking around outside of my illusions. They aren’t a problem unless we engage them.” He took a deep breath, defeated. “I’m going to ally myself with Marluxia.”

If Lexaeus was disappointed, he didn’t show it. He merely slid off the table and steadied himself on numb legs, batting away any attempts that Zexion made to help him.

“Explain everything on the way.”

Zexion grabbed the makeshift satchel and made his way out the door, Namine and the replica be damned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm moving soon so hopefully i'll have a place to write more. so sorry for the delay. i am so grateful for all your wonderful comments. my goal is to finish this before the next game comes out. wish me luck!


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